Londonage Part 2

Step 2. Find Cunzy11

After landing in sunny(ish)
Stansted Airport I was treated to a new challenge: Getting from Stanstead to London. Much to my delight there was a large sign saying, “This way for trains to Central London”. But before I go further I should note that I took a train from Glasgow to Prestwick Airport which was a 50 minute journey costing £2.30. So I’m in the train station under Stansted Airport, I see some service called the “Stansted express”, but I do not see any ticket vendors, I do however see some foreign tourist with the typically huge rucksack, fumbling with a machine that seems to have swallowed his card, So FUCK using that. I get on the train, park myself down, and look around the carriage. There is a sign:

Stansted Express £21 return to
Central London.

Twenty-one pounds! Gutted! That’s almost a 1000% mark up on the
Glasgow to Prestwick Train. Sucks.

So I sit on the train pretending to listen to my iPod, I say pretending, I’m actually just praying to God/Jesus/Buddha/Shigeru Miyamoto/Cloud/Ashleys
underwear (from RE:4), that a conductor does not pass by… I’m not sure what deity intervened but THERE WAS NO FUCKING CONDUCTOR! Awesome!

I arrive in Liverpool Street Station (21 quid heavier too) and resign to the fact that I don’t know where I am or where the hell to go. So I bite the bullet, step outside and have my first fag of the day, and give Cunzy a phone. So essentially I just have to make it to
Kentish Town, piece of piss, underground system ain’t that hard. I arrive with only minor hitches (choosing the wrong line, but at least it went in the right direction…), And well I have no ides, as I have never been to Kent, as to how KentISH it is, but I’ll take London’s word for it. Anyways I finally found the fucker, Cunzy11, hiding behind a phonebox.

Step 2: Find Cunzy11. CHECK.

Score: Richie 2: London 0

To be continued....


  1. I was hiding behind a phone box. For reference it was the left one.


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