A crap review i did for Soul Calibur 3

I did this a while ago, I was trying to be impartial, but instead I pretty much explain the whole game…

Soulcalibur 3: Changing the face of Fighting

Back in 1996 - The Spice Girls were on their Global Domination, the Prodigy were starting fires, Jim Carrey was sorting Ferris Bueller’s Cable TV, and Channel 4 was our last salvage for late night Manga. Some of us were also surfing the glorious learning curve of a game called Soul Blade on the Playstation. Soul Blade (Namco) when released was often referred to as Tekken with swords, and to a certain extent “they” were correct as many of the mechanics integral to the Tekken series were translated to this game. However Soul Blade mixed these Tekken Mechanics with Stunning Character designs, breathtaking visuals, a music score (which offered a remix option) worthy of carrying round on your Discman, and on top of all that the characters had big wooshy Swords!

The Soul Blade/Soulcalibur series is now going into its 10th year, the latest entry "Soulcalibur 3" has to be the most innovative of the series. This title caters mainly of the fan-base of the series, including a full roster of all previous characters dating back to those hazy days of 1996.

In this incarnation of the series players are treated to a huge variety of single player options with independent storylines for most characters offering multiple paths through each characters storyline leading to multiple endings. In addition to the single player storyline the player is offered a selection of different modes such as a tournament mode, and a selection of different scenarios to win, including fighting a “Colossal” stone giant, first hit kills, and coin collecting. All these modes alone allow for a meaty sequel in the Soulcalibur series. But on top of all this the most welcome addition in this series is the custom character creation and the story mode that comes with it.

The character creation section of this game is huge! There is an immense number of character options, on a par with the character creation options found in many of the sports titles such as Tiger Woods or Tony Hawk. Annoyingly at the start only a few items of armour/clothing are available. Once the player progresses through the game, more and more weapons/armour/items will be unlocked, also when progressing, the player will be collecting gold allowing for further purchases of weapons/armour/items to be bought at the shop. Each of the characters that are created chooses from different professions, such as a Monk, Thief or a Pirate (with many more professions to be unlocked as the player goes through the game). Each of the professions then has specialisations in certain weapons, e.g. the Barbarian is proficient in Two-handed swords and Giant Axes. Each of these weapons has its own unique move-set, and thus they are not rip-offs of the standard characters in the game. But on that note as the custom character goes up levels in the “Chronicles of the sword” section the professions will unlock the souls (fighting styles) of the standard characters, e.g. The Barbarian unlocks the “Soul of Astaroth”, and can use all of the standard character Astaroth’s moves.

The Chronicles of the Sword is a section of the game where a custom character is created and it follows a plot using a RTS-type interface where the players created character(s) can battle enemies as they encounter them on the map. The plot is centred around your created character and flows through the game using an experience system, so as the missions proceed your characters skills improve.

All in all, the game has plenty of playability and plenty of re-playability. There are several beautiful little features that make Soulcalibur 3 such as hidden paths in the Story line and unlocking further character classes. There are also the compulsory art galleries with hundreds of images to unlock.

History of Soulcalibur
1996 - Soul Blade. (PS1)
1999 - Soulcalibur. (DC)
2003 - Soulcalibur 2. (PS2, GC, Xbox)
2005 - Soulcalibur 3. (PS2, Unconfirmed for Xbox360)


  1. Yeah yeah but do the female characters' tits wobble if you jump up and down?
    Can you unlock a Voldo S&M video?

  2. Actually, If you go into the "Shop" and select the "items" girl (Valeria?) and repeatedly press Triangle, her Tits bounce at incredible rate. Brilliant.

    P.S. Works with all the shop girls, but Valeria is the best. She is quite clearly the dirtiest... Ahh Valeria.

  3. Did Namco pay you to write this?


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