That guy's a Maniac...

Yeah. So, we at Thatguys were given a Hellgate: London beta key… and after a while of downloading, installing and playing. We have come to the conclusion that it is a solid 6/10. The game does well at integrating MMO and FPS, it removes that turn-based feeling you get with most MMOs. It is more action based and I already got the feeling that boss encounters will allow Leet FPS players to really shine. However I lost ALL faith at the character creation screen. I was not sure what to expect from HG:L but, from the creators of Diablo, I will be honest I expected more than a pretty “cyberpunk” game. Yes that’s right cyberpunk, I hate the word almost as much as I hate the “movement”, couple with that with the hairstyle choices… Ugh… there was an option for some blatantly emo haircuts. The emo swish was actually reversible, I dunno if that actually makes a difference in the emo world, Is it like a message to other emos? Left eye covered – Suicidal. Right eye covered – Attentio

Often at That Guy's A Maniac we forget Capcom did other series of games. Ones without zombies or with the pretty boy with the white hair. Yes that's right, Street Fighter. Anyway, some geniuses over at college humour put together this excellent series which, impressively boasts better dialogue, funnier in-jokes for the fans and greater production values than most video game related films. We found it via the omnireporting Kotaku machine. Here's the trailer on YouTube but you should watch the rest here . Or else.

This Months maniac is nothing other than a girl… as if it wasn’t crazy enough that girls actually play video games ... But check this shit: Observe how she is holding the Joypad, upside down?!? And… get this… she was playing well. I’m sure we have all at some point tried to mess around with how we hold the joypad. For instance, thinking if we have two fingers pressing the Triangle, Square, circle and Ecks button, rather than one thumb, we might be able to perform better. But no matter what, our fingers will reset to the default position where the index finger hovers over R1, the middle finger hovers over R2 and the thumb sits over the right analogue stick. When/If I die I know for a fact my hands will automatically assume the PS2 position, if its an open casket, people will be able to slot a joypad in perfectly, I invite you all to attend and try it out. Laters, Richie-O

Do you remember the post called All the cool kids are doing it.....? I don't. Anyway this is the second post with this title which, makes it another feature I guess. We have lots of features here at TGAM. It's why we are the second greatest videogame blog of all time scientifically proved don't cha know. Anyway lots of the third rate games magazines (Official Nintendo Magazine, Official Playstation magazine etc.) have been including these little crazy look-alike features which they use to fill up column inches because they can't write enough good copy. So there will be a picture of some guy from Eastenders next to a photo of some guy from a game and they will label them with the names the wrong way round. HA hahahahahaha. Everyone laughs. Except! SPONTANEOUS PUBLIC SERVICE MESSAGE When people read games magazines they don't want to be reminded of the real world and their real life. There should be nothing but games from cover to cover. Adverts for other games, re

Hey all! I must say I'm flabbergasted as to the response "Icanhasjillsammich" thanks to everyone who has submitted artwork. Please keep them coming! Here is a selection of some that we have recieved: Noogins...

Yes!! In Nintendo's bid to turn gaming into non gaming we now have Brain Training and Sight Training which means that we are two more installments closer to penis training and the one I'm looking forward to most, pelvic floor training . Touch generations indeed. Nothing worse than a flappy chappy or a slack front crack. No sir.

Read all about it. In this week's comic Omastar is at the time of life where it is pertinent to worry about how one will be remembered. That's the kind of thing you get to dwell on when you've been fired for the production of lacklustre fanservice goods. In other gaming news: No news. Which, is supposedly good news?

Well it is a sad day indeed. I have recently learned that SFC (Stupid Fucking Customers) is dead, gone, deceased. In all seriousness it looks like the SFC guys were busted [via truth of the peasant], a blogger's worst nightmare. However, it just goes to show the short sightedness of the slave driving employers we've all had. They could've seen it for the tongue in cheek reflections of the dull dreary and endless jobs that we've all had and given the guys the go ahead to mention the name of the store as a kind of underground marketing exercise. But no, they decided that someone who had worked there for five years, pulling all kinds of overtime and extra shifts was worth firing because of a blog they had that gets people who work in the games industry chuckling. Seriously, did anyone not go to the store because they read SFC? I think if everyone knew where the store was we all go there to buy games and have our fingers crossed that we would be worthy in the eyes of

To:1 1 From: "Type-0" Wow! This new set up is very interesting Cunzy1 1. Your day note was quite boring you should really make an effort to learn japanese or some shit. I'm not doing the Wii jokes again! Anyway, here at TGAM Towers everything is great. We still have the same asinine commentors and a whole bunch of posts from the puerile to the interesting. What you missed (because it is possible to miss stuff that is posted on a website if you can't detract your eyes from the puke inducing colour scheme): Bewbs Bewbs Bewbs Oh hawt bewbs Bewbs Lol Bewbs and Biff

Dear Type-O This is all part of our new setup. It's a great new innovative feature where we as "editors" write each other boring updates about real life and shit. I'll do the night notes and you can do the day notes. My updates will be about my mail order wife and my kid and how "crazy" where I live is despite the fact I've made little effort to integrate myself into society here. Your updates should be about trying to make what I said interesting so then I can boring it up again tomorrow night. So, just a reminder. Do an update here. Something funny. Maybe something about the new nintendo console being named after piss. Also, we should change our logos and site to puke inducing colours. What do you think? Catch you later 1 1

More Nintendo lies this month with this post over at the "Official" Smash Brothers Dojo. This site is so fake they can't even get the name of the game right. The real name is Super Smash Brothers Brawl. Anyway we brought you the scoop on the real SSBB characters and stages two months ago ( check it fool ). But! Whoever is behind the farcical Dojo site is fucking cruel. It's OK to goad the Fire Emblem geeks but picking on Sega fans is a crime against humanity. Don't build their hopes up. I can here the frantic bashing of keyboards already as they plan their Sonic Faninima's shot with SSBB to add to the steaming pile of Sonic Machinima that already exists. Be advised Dojo webmaster, I'm emailing Google to get you taken off the listings. You've taken this joke too far now. Whilst we are on the subject of shitty fan made crap, this following public notice is brought to you courtesy of our latest "if you can't beat em join em" ti

Yes Richie, or Type-O, as he is now known is enjoying his birthday so we gave him the day off work. This was not in some kind of sickening act of kindness but a lead in into our newest competition.: What did Richie do on his birthday? Here are suggestions but only the secret webcam knows. And me, I know. 1) Wanking, just wanking- 17 votes 2) Playing Guitar Hero and Wanking- 5 votes 3) Smoking and Wanking- 2 votes 4) Watching anime and smoking- 14 votes 5) Watching anime and wanking - 204 votes 6) Playing GTA San Andreas and taking photos of dead prostitutes' splayed legs interspersed with wanking- 1 vote 7) Playing WoW- 4 votes 8) Playing WoW and wanking- 145 votes 9) Wanking and Crying- 3 votes 10) Wanking over this - 1 vote 11) Making " The Real Umbrella" but getting as far as wanking- 26 votes 12) Wanking over pictures of himself wanking- 0 votes 13) Watching anime and switching between smoking and wanking- 4356 votes 14) Going to the pub and wanking in the ladies toi

In response to icanhascheezburger thatguys is starting icanhasjillsammich... Find your favorite Resident evil Pictures, upload them to the icanhascheezburger factory add captions then email them to us: icanhasjillsammich@thatguys.co.uk Enjoy...

It's the long awaited return of Omastar Comics. In this week's edition, Omastar tries to make us feel better for this . Yeah. Thanks but no thanks Omastar. You are fired. Get out and leave all those PPUps I've seen you taking from the stationery cupboard. I'm not being racist or anything but fucking water types.....

The internets! You dissapoint me. Following our request here I was expecting a torrent of videos this morning. But alas: I DON'T SEE IT THERE DO YOU? I had high hopes for the GMV/AMV (Game Music Video/Anime Music Video) Community. I was thinking that you all made derivative Naruto videos with a Linkin Park/Evanesence soundtrack only because no one was making good suggestions for you to use some creativity. This is your chance! A video of this design would bring you your internet five minutes (people online have a shorter attention span) of fame. You might have even got a five star video as rated by real people, not the fellow animu weabos from the forums. You might have made the front page of Kotaku. Do you want to be remixing your shitty video for the rest of your life in the name of fan service? We threw you a bone and this is how you repay us? Well, AMV community, we'll see to it that none of you work on the internet again. Fuckers. You've got one week before w

We have a mission for someone who has more willpower than us, access to technology and a second life account. Could you please make a music video of Hunk from Resident Evil 2 (-onwards) dancing step for step like Rihanna in her video for Umbrella. It should be called "The real Umbrella" Be sure to focus a lot on the Umbrella logo on his back okay? What do you get out of it? Well we have to insist that the credits are at the end but you can go on about all the losers on your AMV forums and how they helped you so much. Hell, you could even use 'lulz' and we might not kick you so swiftly in the chads. Also, if it's any good we'll announce as the game video of the year and that's an accolade you want from the World's Second Greatest Video Game blog of all time . Oh, also at the point with all the men writhing on the floor could you please do that bit with Tofu , also from Resident Evil 2. Thx

Every. Fucking. Year. And there we have it. In my previous post I mentioned that DBZ: BT3, pegged for a late october release, would not be released until Mid-November. And Boom today, the release date has been set for November 30th. I TOLD YOU SO!!!!

Pfft… Even 360’s are gutted with Halo 3: “Halo 3. It wasn’t as cool as I thought it would be…” Amen my little anthropomorphised brother. Amen. Curtsey of http://www.360voice.com/

Timesplitters 2, the single greatest game of all time , and arguably man's greatest acheivement, was the first FPS to do the virus mode well. I know that the sequel to Timesplitters 2, OF WHICH WE HAVE 100% IN ALL THINGS BUT DO NOT SPEAK, messed it up so bad that Bungie had to steal the idea to keep it alive. As long as we all know and we pay props where props is due we can all be friends yes? I don't even want to think about the consequences if I see another "not paying tribute to TS2" post.

This month's EDGE (181) featured a cool virtual tube (underground/metro or playmobil train set in the case of Glasgow) map on the inside of their back over. Scans coming soon. Anyway each stop featured a virtual setting. Can you name the games? Can you name them all? Cerobi Steppe,Frosty Retreat, Station Square, Nibenay Basin, Gates of Rixis, Brinstar,Ironforge, Bowerstone, Thunder Bluff, Jolly Roger Bay, Dullstown, Skingrad, Gizzard Gulch, Burial Mounds, Cosmo Canyon, Mammago's Garage, Vinewood, Barheim Passage, Nova Prospekt, Monkey Islands, Wario Stadium, Big Surf Groove, Goro's Lair, Blood Gulch, Battle Creek, Mushroom Rock Road, Shady Sands, Kamiki Village, Silk Road Ruins, Phendrana Drifts, Quartz Quadrant, Zack Island, Portland, Sherman Dam, Carrick Point, Death Peak, La Razza Canal, Modesto Heights, Gaia's Navel, North Point, Kakariko Village, Old Bullworth Vale, Ravenholm, Sunset Penninsula, Terramax, Mumbo's Mountain, Tulip Garden, Simian Acres, Spring Val

Challenge failed: Yeah I kinna gave up after Friday, after spending 2 hours gaining ‘cheevos in Oblivion I decided this was not the proper way to spend a Friday/Weekend night and as such proceeded to party the rest of the weekend away. Also, it was AV bonus honour weekend so what little gaming I did over the weekend was spend grinding honor. Anyway this is my final score for 1 week (just under 10 hours gameplay :S): Apprentice, Fighters Guild (10) Apprentice, Mages Guild (10) Arch-Mage, Mages Guild (50) Assassin, Dark Brotherhood (10) Associate, Fighters Guild (10) Associate, Mages Guild (10) Bandit, Thieves Guild (10) Bloodletter, Arena (10) Brawler, Arena (10) Cat Burglar, Thieves Guild (10) Champion of Cyrodiil (110) Champion, Arena (10) Champion, Fighters Guild (10) Closed an Oblivion Gate (50) Conjurer, Mages Guild (10) Defender, Fighters Guild (10) Delivered Daedric Artifact (50) Destroyed the Great Gate (50) Eliminator, Dark Brotherhood (10) Escape

Yes in our long running series (2 including this one) of up to the minute live blogging of videogames events posted a month after the fact we are proudish to relay our thoughts on the Pokemon Summer Day Camp way back on the 25th of August. Yes after all my fanboy whinging about how Nintendo hates europe, it seems that they heard my whiny plees and decided to do a Pokemon Summer Day Camp which promised much pokemon related fun and the oppurtunity to get a Mew for the GBA games, which is sure generous Nintendo. How many other games let their players wait 4 years to get something they should have had anyway..... So Chuff_72, our TGAM street correspondant and myself went along in the interests and purity of videogame journalism. Definitely not because neither of us wanted to go alone and one of us, really, really wanted to go. As it turns out we were both movinghouse that weekend but promises and pleading with our better halves meant we busted down to sunny Brent Cross in London for

Alright Kids, It's Friday and for a laugh I have created a Video game related Dingbat... Leave a Comment with the solution... Hint: The answer is not a video games related.

Poor! Very Very Poor! I managed to play for an hour yesterday… 1 hour I managed to slam a load of the Mages guild quests… But I’m still on them. I was hoping by this time to have completed the Mages guild and to have progressed within the Fighters guild (maybe arena). Though it’s not all bad, I have the last remaining Arch-Mage missions left which are not huge challenges, if I can get them done in an hour, and maybe complete the Fighters guild and Arena at the weekend then I will be back on track… maybe. Either way I think we can all see the benefits of NOT having friends when taking on a challenge such as this. The other minor achievement that I got last night, my character is now a Journeyman in Alteration, with Illusion a mere midges baw-hair behind it. Status: Level 7 Apprentice, Fighters Guild (10) Apprentice, Mages Guild (10) Arch-Mage, Mages Guild (50) Assassin, Dark Brotherhood (10) Associate, Fighters Guild (10) Associate, Mages Guild (10) Bandit, Thieves G

Ha! Look at these two it's all going tits up for them. I blame it on the war we had which now means we won . So now we are two for two. However, as the good ship H.M.S SFC starts to sink with Phorenzik jumping ship leaving MarioMark to desperately plug the holes in the hull with spare copies of Resistance Fall of Man we would like to steal some of their traffic and re-iterate one of the most poignant sentiments so beautifully put into words. TALK TALK YOU ARE CUNTS And Google never forgets ! Ha! Live on SFC, live on! Special Message to the guy who's job it is to google Talk Talk daily: Hi mate. We don't want to cause any big trouble we just want the traffic so please don't hack our accounts to shut us down. Just send us an email and we'll take this post off. Okay?

Chuff_72 is our maniac on the street and he regularly send us stuff to post when we are too busy doing pointless challenges and mixing up T-Virus to destroy the world if Capcom doesn't deliver vidjogames on demand. His stirling efforts have earned him at least a cameo in the TGAM film and he is an unlockable character in TGAM the game . Anyway, here at TGAM we are dedicated to doing what everyone else already did before us, and doing it twice! Here are some more thoughts on that game what came out recently Halo 3. Take it away Chuffty: "Dude, just a quick email to tell you how much fucking fun halo 3 is online. I didn't play any of the various deathmatch types or any of that bollocks, and while I checked out some co-op story which was okay, though pretty hard to follow with myself, the Dr and two fellow TFUs, shouting about the Gheys in the trees, most of the time I had no idea where to go apart from follow the little countdown marker thing, AND friendly fire was on, wit

OK, Ok, enough grief already, yeah halo 3, biggest selling media opening thing EVER (194 million copies on the opening day, more than any movie or game ever.). I’m still pressing on with my Oblivion quest. So far it is not going as well as expected due to 2 major hitches: 1. I spent far too long pissing about with character creation. I rolled the character last night and spent ages choosing a race and the features etc. I opted for a Breton and created a custom “Paladin” class for this venture. For those of you that don’t know, when you roll a new character in Oblivion you have to do a little section where the way you have played it will be judged and a class will be suggested to you. You can then opt to choose this class, choose from one of the 21 pre-designed classes, or create your own class. I created my own class but spent far too long on it… 2. I got fucking ejected from the Mages guild. Yeah, I was firing though all the stupid Mages guild associate quests, where

After some serious thought I have decided that it may be entirely possible to get 1000 gamer points in 1 week (whilst maintaining a social life) I have never personally owned Oblivion, all of the playtime that I have amassed is on a friends 360 and his copy of the game. This however does give me a basis for the game mechanics. This will be entirely an “achievement speed run”, and does not include the shivering isles expansion pack. The achievements in Oblivion are split into 6 different sections: Main Quest 6 Achievements – 360 points Fighters Guild 10 Achievements – 140 points Mages Guild 10 Achievements – 140 points Thieves Guild 8 Achievements – 120 points Arena 9 Achievements – 130 points Dark Brotherhood 7 Achievements – 110 points My plan is to start a “Paladin” class fighter/healer focussing on blade and restoration. Upon leaving the sewers I will then venture to complete the mages guild quest line, which is arguable longer than the main quest line,

Dear Capcom Right. This is it. I have written to you on many occasions and not a single reply. This is not on, especially considering how many of your franchises only sold so well off the back of our glowing reviews and hard hitting articles on Capcom and Capcom characters . But that's it now. You took it too far. Dido is dead. I stuffed her in the boot of my car and drove it off a bridge. I phoned the police and told them you did it. Ha! how do you like that? This will be you if you do not comply with our demands: But also, it seems that not only are you ignoring our pleas but you are deliberately doing things to annoy us. Case in point? Well Lost Planet for starters. What the Fuck? But also look at Devil May Cry 4. What the fucking fuck is that poor man's homoerotic excuse for a younger, camper much much less cool Dante, that you call Nero? Are you having a laugh? Did you even play MGS2? No one likes Raiden and no one will like Nero. I've scoured the interne

I'm sure I did a post like this before but couldn't find it in the tons of shit we put on the internet in our humble year and a bit at TGAM Towers (TGAM Small Bedsit would be more appropriate, one of those ones with a totally illegal kitchen cum bedroom-lounge, with no official arrangment with the landlord other than you gave them four grand when you first moved in and since then they have managed to avoid fixing the bathroom like they said they would when the 12 year old crack head in a suit that was your "estate agent" showed you round). Anyway we've been part of the 'next generation' of consoles for quite a while and they are totally fucking dissapointing, the short sightedness of developers and marketing people is absolutely fucking astonishing. Why won't someone, anyone do anything about it? Well I found this secret memo on the internet and I think it tells us all a tale or two: Three Years Ago THINGS FOR NEXT GEN by games making people. 1) Bette

Right well, on Friday The second most popular video games blog: www.thatguys.co.uk managed to get a hold of a copy of Halo 3. As such we will do a review of it though whether you read it is entirely up to you, we will not try and force our views upon you. Gameplay FPS Action shooter, and it knows it. Strafe. Aim. Shoot. Repeat until done. There is not variance in the weapons: Pistol = 2 shots to kill enemy. 1 to remove armour, 1 to shoot in the head. Shotgun = 2 shots to kill enemy. 1 to remove armour, 1 to shoot in the head. Equipment is not necessary, throwing the odd shield, rarely helps you out, though these may be more useful in the harder modes Crouch (L3 by default) has to be held down, and since L3 is one of your movement sticks, it makes crouching and moving very hard, there is also no sniper position. Story Makes absolutely no-sense if you have not played Halo 1 and/or 2, it is disjointed all the way through, the plot also seems to be catering for 12-13 year olds. Do not exp

On saturday night just gone, I found myself with a free evening. And due to the absolute fantastic quality of British television on Saturday nights I thought I might, you know, play some videogames so I could do a proper post on my video games blog. Now because I'm still feeling like this I ended up playing both Animal Crossing and Animal Crossing Wild World. Suffice to say everyone was majorly pissed off with me because I haven't been to Gaylando in over 400 days (see a post coming soon) but they are a fickle peoples and after a little bit of talking to everyone my peeps seemed happy, neigh, almost pleased to see me again. Including my virtual stalker target Bunnie . However, whilst chatting with my love she showed me this "weird" letter (her words): Now I assure you that this is an image of a letter but a crappy phone camera combined with an old DS resulted in the above image. For those of you who can't make out the text! or those of you who can't