Team: 1 1

When we signed up to finally battle each other it was with some trepidation. It was of course the natural destination for both of us playing these games side by side for so many years. I guess it takes you that long to get familiar with the game but it's only now that it seems right to battle against each other. God knows how it is going to pan out but little did Richie know that I started battling him before we were even in the same country!

Psychological warfare. It is my strength in life and multiplayer games. I'm rarely the best at any game but I can get a slight edge with a bit of psychological battering. In this instance I had a head start. Months before we were due to meet up I had been hounding Richie in a dirty war. Underhand tactics to be sure. One aspect of all successful games that I despise and hate is the 'community'. Any community tends to charge themselves with sucking all the fun out of the game. Super Smash Brothers community is one such who artifact a tier list written by pro players. In reality there isn't a single pro Super Smash Brothers player but it helps to create some sense of authority amongst the morons. And knowledge is always second hand from my "Pro friend" or my friend at school knows a "Pro". In either case I don't think they mean prostitute sadly. The Pokemon community is exactly the same. Just look at this nauseating list of nauseating lexiconography from the nauseating Bulbapedia. If I ever find myself using those terms in real life please bludgeon me to death with the corner of a NES pad please ugh. Anyway in the preamble to the battle I was forwarding links to Richie taken from Bulbapedia and Pokemon forums in order to shake his confidence in his constructed team. I was also dropping misleading hints, half truths, white lies and cunningly masked red herrings about which Pokemon I was going to use. Alternatively, I would announce that I was looking for a certain item in the game leading Richie to believe I was using it for "the team". I also got Rob_is_Gay to do some double agent work sending Richie an apparent 'inside information' email.

That's the pre battle warfare out of the way here's the squad from which the team was chosen. Levelling Pokemon up to level 100 is an extraordinary pain in the ass and because I have a life I didn't have hours and hours to invest in a whole new team so there was a large element of working with some of the tools I already had at level 100.

The Squad that never made it

Kyogre, Rayquaza and Mewtwo Legendaries were out in the rules we agreed we would stick to, which means that these guys would have to be sidelined. Legendary Pokemon have stats way way above what the non legendary Pokemon have, so this ruling was a fair way of making it into a contest rather than a baust-fest.

Raichu I have no idea where I got this level 100 Raichu from. Totally not EV'd. And rubbish stats.

Alakazam Again, where/when did I get this? No idea. Rubbish stats. Also, I predict Richie will be using a bunch of dark types making Alakazam totally useless.

Ditto Is actually still on Pokemon Colosseum. And there he/she will stay!

Omastar Star of Omastar Comics. Poorly trained and with the crap swift swim ability. Sorry Omastar.

Armaldo, Cradilly, Relicanth These were all possibles but I anticipated that Richie would be anticipating a team of all fossil Pokemon so I switched these out.

Wigglytuff I levelled a Wigglytuff because I am a fan of Jigglypuff from SSB. Unfortunately, under no circumstances is it to be used in EPIC battles.

The Final Six
Hmm this team looks underwhelming
Crobat Scratch that. A SHINY Crobat. Caught on Fire Red, transferred to Sapphire and then migrated to Diamon. Crobat is an annoyer with U-turn, Poison Fang, Air Slash and Confuse Ray. He is nippy too.

Aerodactyl Semi-cheating with Aerodactyl as it's overall stats get quite high with the right training. Aerodactyl is basically a speedy destroyer with Rock Slide, Fly, Crunch and Giga Impact. He holds a choice band.

Kabutops Kabutops is a bit of a wild card (read weak link) no particular strength other than a diverse set of moves and some high att stats. Wring out, Night Slash, Aqua Jet and Mega Drain.

Bastiodon Despite all the agonising, Bastiodon is one of the only Pokemon I specifically started training for this fight to make it to level 100 without me losing heart or abandoning it half way. Astronomical defense and special defense with a Metal Burst, Iron Defense, Thunderbolt and Protect moveset.

Charizard My Fire Red starter. Nowhere near as good as my original Charizard of the Yellow/Silver age but after some stat crunching on spreadsheets he is above average. He's got Blast Burn, Slash, Dragon Claw and Fly.

Swampert My Sapphire starter. Similar to Charizard, the starters stats are generally quite good so he ended up on the team despite only having one move at level 100 (the others had to be removed to be transferred to Diamond). The final moveset is Earthquake, Ice Beam, Hammer Arm and Surf.

The Plan

and I predict that Richie has tons of annoyers and annoying combos. Unfortunately, in the dirty war before hand we mislead each other so much that I had no idea who he would be fielding in the final fight. Richie loves attacking so probably plumped for some Pokemon that are naturally well defended so a smattering of steel types maybe Metagross and Bronzong in which case SwampertCharizard may come in useful. I have a hunch he has some dark and psychic Pokemon but there's adequate type coverage to deal with these. He might have a sandstorm team with Tyrannitar, Flygon and Cacturne but half my team will reap the benefits of a sandstorm too. I plan to lead with Crobat who can do some annoying or switch out so I have a chance to get the type advantage straight away. Richie has expressed no interest in speed so hopefully Charizard, Aerodactyl and Crobat get in first. Swampert also has a quick claw just in case. Bastiodon may well prove to be not very useful but I doubt Richie has predicted I have it and metal burst might save the day.

So the plan is simple. Start of with Crobat and then go from there. I've got most of the bases covered with a diverse moveset. Aerodactyl for some big damage, Charizard and Swampert for a bit of crowd control. Bastiodon for heavy hitters and damage sponges. And Kabutops. At the last minute I noticed that I've got three flyers which may be a bit of a weak spot for me.

Wish me luck

Cunzy1 1 x x x x


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