That guy's a Maniac...

First of all, for those of you who don know, Bif Naked is primarily the main singer in the band "Bif Naked". But she has also been known to dabble elsewhere. Notably as the voice of Zoe from SSX Tricky, “ I can see my house from here ”. But had also starred in the terrible film House of the Dead , and had made loads of TV appearances, including Buffy: the vampire slayer. Anyway so for like the first time EVER Bif Naked has performed in the UK as a support act for some pishy band called Alterbridge . And well She played on Friday 9 th June at the ABC venue in Glasgow , So I paid my money just to see Bif Naked, and fucked off before crappy Alterbridge came on. Well, the gig was short , she played mostly new stuff but it was still awesome! However! No one knew her! I was gutted! A crowd of lifeless plebs all just staring blankly! I was RAGING! “APPRECIA TE THE BIF!” So on behalf of Glasgow I want to extend an apology for the MINDLESS PHILISTINES! And we a

In the small hours of Saturday night/Sunday morning I finally did it! I reached Level 60! After hours and hours of grinding , questing and farming I finally did it, My Mage hit Level 60! Let me take you through it: Me pointing at the "mob" that's gonna take me to level 60 Me hitting level 60! Me dancing on the remains of the "mob" If you are interested, or want to give me Gold/Items/Cybaaaaaaaar, my server is Runetotem, and I am a Human Mage called Richie….

He is actually still-a-fucking- alive . Ed, we're not worthy! We're not worthy. For those of you who haven't read this blog or played disc 12 of PlayPlusses (or Some old magazine) Demo Disc, Ed Federmeyer is a god. Do you remember Net Yaroze Playstations? They were black and people could program really shit games. They cost about 4 grand and for a while every magazine used to have a section on their demo disc with a selection of the same 9 homebrew "This is what you can do with Net Yaroze"games. Most of them were poor but one game, Haunted Maze , was head and shoulders above all games then and since. You played as a man in a maze..... anyway the best game ever, and whilst it loaded the game up it told you that Ed Federmeyer made it in three weeks. Even now when we have a get together at some point in the evening Haunted Maze goes on and it takes a force of nature to get it turned off, so we can carry on playing not-free, this gen games.

Well, yesterday I found this article (on Game Girl Advance , well you've got to pretend right? Whats the point of going online if you can't pretend to be a girl anyway), read all three posts, and thought WOW! They have kinda done what I mused about here . A great place for people to go and game in comfort, with leagues, big screens, spectators, games for sale usw. usw.! So I checked out the Game Time Nation homepage and it's been closed now for about two years. Nevermind. That's that experiment I can cross of my list of things to do.

Just as a follow up to Cunzys Letters to Mr Sony, Microsoft and Nintendo: I realised in some way each one of these companies is striving to get you to play the games that they want you to play: Example 1: Sony – Hmm, these are the least evil, however they pile out any shite possible on the system. Example 2: Microsoft – Quote: “Fuck back compatibility! You will only play our (Huge range) of new 360 games… Dicks.” Example 3: Nintendo – These guys are the worst! Not only are they fucking releasing what they feel like localising to Europe , but they also tell you how you should play it! Fuck that if I want to play Animal Crossing for 6 hours then not touch it for a month I will! Laters

Yeah that’s right, I am posting about Mobile games! As well, unfortunately I am an osmotic expert in this area. Now I know ‘gamers’ quickly dismiss mobile gaming, and quite rightly so, there is a myriad of terrible cash-ins, all because there are fucking retards out there that are willing to buy screensavers, wallpapers, ringtones and games based on fads (Crazy frog anyone). And all these fucking mobile distribution fucks do is charge it to their mobile accounts for a picture or a midi file, if anybody just realised the 90% of the phones out there have pc connectivity you could download a better jpeg/midi file and be slightly more individual. Conclusion if you EVER even THINK about downloading a ringtone from one of those FUCKING ADVERTS on music channels, you are a braindead fuck who doing nothing but contributing to the lowering of standards of media everywhere, YOU “SUN” READING FAECAL ABORTION! All that’s aside in amongst the shit there are actually some good games which are well

Ok so, yesterday was a bit ranty so here is some medicine to remind me why I bother. For years I’ve lived a double life. In the day I do my job, I ride the bus, Roll up my sleeves with the hoi polloi. But at night I live a life of exhilaration, Of missed heartbeats and adrenaline, And, if the truth be known, A life of dubious virtue. I won’t deny I’ve been engaged in violence, Even indulged in it. I have maimed and killed adversaries, And not merely in self defence. I have exhibited disregard for life, Limb, And property, And savoured every moment. You may not think it to look at me, But I have commanded armies, And conquered worlds. And though in achieving these things I have set morality aside, I have no regrets. For though I’ve led a double life At least I can say, I have lived. Still as effective now. Video here. Although almost everyone is naked in this vid.