That guy's a Maniac...

We are now up to killing these guys. For those of you who have played it you would know that that is not very far. Some people interpret these guys to be "Teh Blacks". Because they are um black? But they have horns and big pointy teeth. To be honest I'm not too happy about genociding them. Two of them were talking to each other just over a tree topped bluff whilst my guys were clearing rocks out of the way to start the genocide. Touchingly, the two chaps were talking about wood, crowns (maybe me?) and each other. I was struck by a pang of guilt as my inept force mowed them down in bloodless violence. One of my guards stood on the head of one and hacked at it with a sword in the face. It turned into a sweet. The horn of another one was harvested for the town coffers. Elsewhere about the town two citizens and two of my guards got married. Both instantly received a delivery of a new born child, one of which saw active service in the genocide mentioned above about four secon

*Please stop these people being our voice* Not because they are Fugly, not because they are male... ...because I'm pissed that they got to #15 in Time Magazine for a trashy webcomic (there are much better ones out there) and maybe a little bit because of their looks, mostly because they do not believe they deserve this kind of honour. I cant say it much harsher; THEY. ARE. UNDESERVING. (IMO) In all honesty you could have slung any gaming celebrity on the voting pole in there place, hell... put Mario on there and he would have done the same/better. Love and the Bald one has been caught abusing animal corpses. Richie X

So who does it include this time? From the Pics we have seen so far:  * An oddly uncanny-valley-esque Incredible Hulk. * A selection of characters from Marvel vs Capcom 2 * And the one everyone is fapping about: Chris Redfield. Chris was the star* of Resident Evil, Resident Evil: Code Veronica and Resident Evil 5.  Chris is not the first Resident Evil character in the Marvel vs Capcom Series and well considering the events of Resident Evil 5 you can understand why she may not be around. Other than that, well we don't actually have a character list, it was just a trap to get google hits. Though likely to be appearing. yet not announced and not from previous iterations: Frank West Sir Om-nom-nom Bionic Commando The dude from Dark Void Deadpool *If you don't get this pun then get the fuck out, nobody cares about your opinion and you cannot call yourself a Resident Evil fan, end of. Love and Zangief, Richie X

No. They are films. Except documentaries. They are TV shows? Anyway, we're already more than a line into this blog and nobody has looked at the wittle puppy. Look at the widdle puppy! This reminds us, if Nintendo and Capcom carry on this massive love in after Monster Hunter Tri then we we would quietly suggest a Nintendogs:Okamiden Version. Yes we would. In other news: this list is pretty interesting . If you are reading this on a feed reader then this is super secret text for you none of the other readers can see this but if they did make Nintenokamiden then they should totally allow bad touching to get the furries buying this sick filth. I'll take a 10% cut of all profits CapTendo. 20% if you allow bad touching. Cheers!

Even in the days of hype and over exposure where every screenshot, press release and 'leak' is vivisected and analysed there are still few moments in gaming that match the trepidation of loading up a game for the first time. Our personal ritual is to make sure there are no other distractions for the first spool up. The tea is brewed, the cat is fed, the phone is silenced, the meat is beat so that until we are prompted to press start our full attention is on the first impression of yet another new virtual world. Sometimes, the impression is a bad one, a misstep in the opening FMV, poor design or a hard to navigate menu dramatically drops the expectations. Sometimes games whisk you through the back door the first time you play dumping you straight into the game, a practice which we are always a bit suspicious about, for some people the mantle really does matter as much as the fireplace. Little King's Story had us completely charmed by the time we got to starting the game, the

It only took a year but we have finally added (a new copy BTW!) Little King's Story to the collection. We feel really bad for waiting so so long especially considering the tumultuous time that Cing has had recently. As much as we don't want to bang on about internet gaming peoples inane shouting versus real life gamers it does actually take a whole year on longer to purchase a game. We're old enough to have some disposable cash to feed the gaming bunny but finding the time to play them means it can be months of years before we pick up a title. The reason why we had left it so long because it got unanimously high ratings we assumed it would be easy to pick up when we eventually get round to it on our to play list. However, this title, widely considered to be one of the best for the Wii, isn't available through GAME online, let alone in stores and we saw a copy of it for £8 at the local supermarket* sandwiched between some of the vilest shovelware that many complain abou

DEFCON 2 is when we all stop banging on about "what happened to...." and start complaining that "they will ruin it" already. The Ace RPS has the link with the scoop but it looks like we're probably one step nearer to something Syndicate*. *Of course, here at Kotaku we tirelessly check all the sources we link to right back to the horse but if it turns out this is some kind of joke then I pity the fool who clearly has no understanding about words like "joke" or "humour". So it says here on your CV that you were the one who started the 2010 Syndicate joke? How does that joke go again? Oh. Yes. That isn't really a joke is it? That's just retarded. No you cannot have a job here and furthermore we'll see to it that you never work in this principality again!