Posts

Family Guy: Well fuck it it was cheap on Steam

Image
So based the greatness of South Park: Stick of Truth I took a punt on the Family Guy Game and fucking frankly I'm glad it was only a couple of quid. It is the curse of the steam sale, you see something that you wouldn't normally buy and you buy it because it's super cheap. Which incidentally is the steam sale ethos, it's £1.99 that they were not actually going to see. But anyways: fuck it have a list. Played through it, it's painfully easy up until the last boss, where it is just cheap. The plot is not even in tone with the show. The audio is simply lifted from the show. The game looks pretty shitty, the 3D does not work! Its a straight up generic 3rd person shooter. Like super generic. I mean why do they have guns? Like proper guns! Not even themes, just guns, shotguns etc. Anyway it only lasts few hours, fuck it. Try not to buy it, it's really not good. Love and Richie X *I'm not writing one, I feel dirty enough after playing that ga

Every Day We're Pokemon Shuffling

Image
Like everyone else we were reaching for the pitchforks when Pokemon Shuffle was launched, a title published by Nintendo with explicitly freemium bullshit unlike the freemieish Steel Diver: Sub Wars which started life slightly less free to play and then got updated to be slightly more free to play and of course the Pokemon Trading Card Game Online which is a card game so for whatever reason the gaming press give it a pass or don't bother covering it. As lifelong Pokemon players I'd also like to throw in the "physically drag yourself to a GAME store to download a legendary Pokemon" for the Pokemon main series into the same category but only because those experiences have been so harrowing in the past it feels like a cost that transcends money. Our trajectory with this game went like this:   Please won't you buy some jewels to errr shuffle me? Please? Boo. Hiss. Ninty sellouts! It's... okay but I'd like to buy it. I doubt I'll stick with

South Park: Stick of Truth

Image
So again we are reviewing a game that came out ages ago. But man... we just completed this bad boy and its fantastic. First up is the animation! It's flawless the whole thing plays like watching an episode, all the story events include your character right in there wearing what ever clothes you have given them, outside of that the player moves in familiar areas and it feels exactly like South Park. Extreme Kudos on that. Gameplay is sweet, the RPG mechanic they put in there is so much fun to play the character attacks are fun, if a bit repetitive, to watch. You level up you gain access to new and funny attacks, you can even ply with perks and customise your character further. The plot, The game is plot driven and it's so fucking funny, there is so many nods to references throughout the entire 20ish years South Park has been running. It's got the same laugh out loud, shock, cringe, factor as the show, brilliantly done. There are some familiar references and a couple

Get Your Smashies on

Image
So we finally fucking did it. We got ourselves a "Next-Gen" console. The Wii U. Wait what do you mean it's not a next-gen console? It's actually less powerful than the Xbox 360, never mind the Xbox one? Well whatever, SMASH BROS BITCHES!!! Oh here have some fucking screenshots: There's me Dual fucking wielding, as you should be able to do in any real sequel.  Dual wield goggle bitch pikachu.  Cunzy and I chilling out on Mario Galaxy world. Cunzy and Togepi about to fuck up shit. Yeah take that, fucking lvl 50 amiibo Peach!  Cunzy checks out Wii fit girls butt... Alone time required. Yeah So Smash Bros, makes a WiiU worth it. Love and Sticky Bombs, Richie X

Season's Greetings

Image
Due to austerity measures, we're only allowed to post one article a year. Here is this years. Merry Xmas 2015 everybody. Cunzy1 1 & Richie too.

A game from 10 years ago.

Image
So I fucking bought San Andreas... Again. (Currently owned: PS2, Steam, Windows Phone, now 360) It was really just on a whim, £2.99 on XBox Live seemed well worth a punt. I had a dick-about with the iOS/Windows Phone version and as cool as it is to have San Andreas in your "pocket" the controls are just wank. Nobody likes a fake dual analogue stick game. But the 360 version is worth it. Its prettier than 10 years ago, it now has achievements, it actually stands the test of time! Downside is after playing the iOS version I am very aware that this is the port of the iOS version and now a newly reconditioned version, there are obvious giveaways with the controls. And it crashed a couple of times. Love and Hot Coffee, Richie

I Love Rodland

Image
A beautiful bit of "16-bit" work. The whole thing is just the epitome of the crazy Japanese pixel are you come to expect from the mid 90's You don't see shit like this nowadays, no siree, Its all fucking hyper real sci-fi men with brown hair. Where's the fantasy where is the off-the-wall utter madness you used to see in games. Even the fucking F2P Monstrosities with cartoon graphics still settle into the old D&D tropes. Love and Fuck you, I'm old, I get it, Richie X