Nintendo Channel: Now Showing

Attending prior international affairs, means that today will be spent trying to hunt down fucking E3 videos (we just don't trust your spin) and catching up with the good ol' Nintendo Channel. Fortunately, a paltry FOUR videos since last time means it'll all be over soon and we can get back to finding E3 videos. Nintendo TV continues with episode two all about the 'Wii world cup'. This video feels oddly familiar pitting the Miis of various famous Englishmen against the Miis of various famous Germans in a five challenge in Wii Sports Resort, Mario and Sonic at the Olympic Games, Mario Kart and Wii Fit Plus. Why don't you create your own Wii World Cup? Nice idea ONM but a credit would be nice next time Chris. Super Mario Galaxy 2 has a third trailer up on the channel. Fortunately, it's a medley of the all those bits you've no doubt seen before so don't worry about more spoilers. We get the point Nintendo. We'll buy it already. Christ on

Kinect. It's K-new

If E3 was the Gulf of Mexico and Kinect an oil spill you can find all the sickly oily penguins trying to work out what the fuck over here . E.g "It is not possible to make any serious hardcore game without a controller with this level of technology." Fact. Brilliant. Also, bingo .

That Microsoft E3 Expo's a Maniac... 2010

So E3 then? So what do we have to look forward to in the next year for the 360? Ahem, Kinect. It's Wii style flappin, without the controller. It's all very sophisticated supposedly, it's like a really expensive webcam with features like face recognition. Apparently all you need to do is wave to select your profile... I'll believe that when I see it... I still resent that 15 minutes of switching profiles when I go to a mates house, but at least I don't need to get everyone in the room to look away when I enter my password, now I just... need... to... wave... Cough, The new Xbox. It's shiny, smaller, quieter, has a bigger hard disk, 5 USB ports and some special connection for Kinect, pretty much everything you could want in a "Slim" model. Achooo, Sequels. Gears of War, Halo, Fable, Call of Duty, Metal Gear. not to be sneezed at. Love and Sony/Ninty better be more interesting, Richie X

Dead Rising 2: Rigor Mortis in my pants

So yeah Dead Rising 2 (due out around Autumn) is gonna have playboy advertisements in it: Now as far as in game advertising goes, I'm not overly offended... But of course certain members of the games community are taking offence at this...  There was one guy - I shit you not - complaining, "great another game I cant play in front of my kids"... like really... REALLY!?! The game where you pick up a Stick and a Chainsaw, secure them together, to create some deadly hideous object, (Which I like to call a "Chick" or a "Stainsaw") and then swing it around dismembering the living dead, along with some rather nuts non-dead people... That game? BUT Now that it might have tits in it, your kids definitely can't look at it, what ass-backwards logic... Tool. Oh yeah, and it's not offensive to women or gays either, because neither women nor homoseckshuals will play/understand Dead Rising 2. So yeah, playboy meets the living dead. Let the Necrophi

You don't say?

From EDGE " The Wii and DS markets have “collapsed”, according to Namco Bandai’s VP of sales, marketing and publishing Olivier Comte....... “It’s a tough market,” Comte told MCV . “We had a lot of product, and the average quality of a game on DS and Wii is very, very bad. So in the mind of the consumer today, to buy a DS or Wii game is to buy a game that isn’t very good." Namco's E3 lineup From ONM Namco Bandai Dragon Ball: Origins 2 (DS) Pac Man 2010 (TBC) . Okay so Pac Man 2010 might just be the Citizen Kane of games . No no. Fuck off Namco Bandai. Just fuck off.

Everybody Votes Idea

The excellent Everybody Votes Channel on the Nintendo Wii has the uber Web 2.0 option for (l)users to submit questions for future polls. About a month ago I made the following suggestion: This has still not been a question on the channel yet so something must have gone wrong when I sent it in to Nintendo. I have emailed them this JPEG this time so they definitely won't miss it. Expect to see this question on the channel soon!

Omastar Comics #26

We all saw the rise, the fall, the rise again, the predictable re-fall, the return, the fall to rock bottom, the Hello! recovery special, the weight problems, the diet series, that Oprah show, those photos, that white powdery substance from that part of that Lickitung. Those ads, that smile, the love Omanyte scandal. But now. Defying the odds. HE. IS. BACK. AGAIN. The one, the only. Oma. Staaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar. Of course, there's no way we'd let comic 26 just go by uncelebrated so this one is with special guest star, that's right it's only fudging Omastar. No it's all different now. Some stars should be allowed to fall. Sell out. Selloutstar more like. Get me Octillery on the phone. We need a new star. TO BE CONTINUED