That guy's a Maniac...

E3 again folks! E3 again! Want to see the games you'll be picking up for £10 in two months from now? Sure thing . Need some more ammunition to keep up those tired old 'console wars' between you and other moron-losers on the forum? Hey fuckface. It's Efunking3. Want to be told what shit you'll be eating next and exactly how to grin whilst you do it? Well then, you may have heard of a lil ol thing called E3. Here's our how to guide: 1) Find the official live E3 presentation stream a Danish pirate stream that occupies a small 2 by 3 cm screen with six or seven pixels worth of definition, get some popcorn and settle in to watch the laggy presentations whilst clueless meatheads keep asking "So am I supposed to play Gears 3 standing up?" over and over and over again in between the indistinguishable Danish chit chat in the 'open chat box'. 2) Milliseconds after anyone says anything Alt tab to the one of the myriad of fora you have open and type in LO

We've finally got around to picking up a copy of the reasonably acclaimed De Blob for our Nintendo Wii. We have played the first couple of levels and out current analysis is: JOY. The sound, the colour, THE PURE HAPPY JOY. We're only three levels in; we hope that the Inkies don't suddenly turn into SUPER GENET(/R)IC MUTANT SOLDIERS or the game dramatically turns into a flight sim half way through because it's only a fundamental game change of that order that has the potential to ruin the rest of the game. It is a happy and pretty game and this cutscene might rank as one of our favourite game cutscenes of all time (well okay second to sexing a dead man ). The one we're on about is 2.28 in the video below, the favourite cutscene not the necrophilia one which can be found here . A lot of writers have been going on about the problem with ubiquitous violence in video games but a quick glance at the games shelf and Zack and Wiki, Another Code: Rubbish, De Bl

Over at that other filthy site I sometimes write for I have a new article up about what would happen if Jesus, Charles Darwin, Adolf Hitler and Albert Wesker went head to head in bloody battle played some gentlemenly sports against each other. Something is wrong with the writing because at least three people have asked about the scores after the golf game. I say to ye, read the text carefully. Anyway as a special little gift to the TGAM faithful, here's the footage for the rounds that didn't make the final cut: Adolf and Darwin go head to head in the dress up as a cowboy and catch a slippery grumpig competition. The winner was the one who identified the 'real pretty mouth first'. Darwin doing pretty bady in the chat up a bitch round. There was also the hide the sausage round but that's a post for a slow news day y'know? Bonus features!

As some may be aware, if you buy a new copy of Dragonage you get a redemption code for 'The Stone Prisoner' DLC included in the box. For those not buying a new copy the DLC will cost you 1200MS Points, which quite frankly is quite a lot for a little plot and an extra character. But hey it's a nice way of keeping people buying new games and supporting the medium right? Well imagine my dismay when I see on the back of the box in the small print that the code expires on April 30th! Seeming like an obvious EA scheme to maintain the high price of an ageing game I was naturally pissed off. However dear reader, the silver lining (and the point) of this tale is that I fired in the code anyway (on June 2nd) and it worked anyway!! So if you are on the fence about buying this great  game and feeling cheated about the DLC, then get involved, the code (as of June 2nd) has yet to expire! Đ

Bank holiday Monday is for plans, plans, plans and then those plans getting totally scuppered by The Yesterday Channel (the past is always present) and back to back episodes of Nazi Hunters. Spontaneous thought for the day: when will games be able to 'do' the liberation of concentration camps with the due gravitas? Looking to the awful (single player) Modern Warfare 2 (awful game, awful story and awful schlock tactics) which in many ways is the (inappropriate) poster child for games if not gamers, I'd say not for another decade at least. So instead of generating actual new content now that the bank holiday has been practically spent, I'm going to write up my thoughts of the MCM expo whilst they are still fresh in my mind. Firstly, the day involved at least five types of queueing but fortunately, impromptu games of identify the cosplayer made all the queuing a bit more palatable. For a ticketed event, you would assume that the venue would have been a little bit more prep

Bank Holiday Monday blogging! Once again, we've been watching the Nintendo Channel so you don't have to. Can we get a "slow news week"? Now the love affair with Monster Hunter is over there's not a great deal of new or good stuff on the Nintendo channel since last week . Those ace Warioware: Do it Yourself videos continue with Todd Lewis, that chap from Scribblenauts who makes a rather lovely micro game but who comes across as very very nervous under the pressure. Worth a watch and again, we hope these videos keep a coming. Penta Tentacles is a colourful flow-a-like from the 'artstyle' family which looks a little bit derivative if we are honest. Still, we'll reserve judgement from when we've had our hands on it and more than likely we'll find ourselves still up at 4am in the morning collecting floaty bits. There's a Dragon Quest IX trailer up, which as you can imagine looks like what you'd expect a Dragon Quest IX trailer to lo

Syndicate Wars was the first PlayStation game I ever owned. I had played Syndicate at a friends' house and it was with some excitement when my brother and I popped the PSX version in for the first time. Up to 4 player co-op, manga signposts, awesome soundscape (we loved Neotokyo on Timesplitters 2 because of how Syndicate it felt), bank robbing, pursuada-tronning, setting trigger wire traps, getting into a hover car and flying about, setting crowds on fire, the meaty spit when the LR rifle liquidises a person from range. That whole game was amazing* and we'd poured hours and hours into the game (occassionally accompanied by the good Dr. Wo). We played the Eurocorp Agent missions because, hey, guys in trench coats are so much cooler than the guys with the shoulder pads. Apparently, I've just discovered, there was actually a proper 'plot' according to wikipedia but I never read any of the mission briefings and still loved it. Eventually, we managed to get to the las