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Showing posts with the label CG Boobies

We got another letter!

Dear Thatguys, Since you guys seem to be into survival horror, I was just wondering what you think of Silent Hill: Homecoming. And what do you guys make of Dead Space? Regards, Sherryluvr296. Well reader, thanks for your question, clearly you are an avid reader and saw our recent epic post on survival horror. Firstly nobody has actually managed to have a proper play at Silent Hill: Homecoming because yet once again, Europe sat at home quietly waiting by the phone for Konami to ring. They promised they would phone in mid-November, but no. We just get a text from our mutual friend Kotaku, saying that Konami is having a bit of a hard time and wont be able to meet up until at least Q1 of 2009. So we retire back to watching X-factor, crying softly into our knitting thinking about all the dizzying and sordid acts that America is currently doing to Konami's Silent Hill! In short, we are looking forward to it… Expect a review in 2009 along with us prising Konami for giving us some really

Heavy Rain the paper cut killer

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There is hype abound fellow sailors. Hypery and balderdashery truth be told! It surrounds a game called Heavy Rain: The Metro killer. Many of you will have seen The Casting , a full motion video used to show the full body and facial motion capture techniques used to show the full range of emotions that most games still struggle to show. Emotions like "crying" and "angry crying" and "crying because you didn't put the bin out again". Many of you may know that this game will be the next game from David "shagged a dead guy" Cage, the previous game was Fahrenheit and it involved a woman who shagged a dead guy. What The Casting and previous press releases fail to tell you about this new game is that there will not be any shagging of dead guys in this game. We phoned David Cage to ask him why this wasn't mentioned in any preview we saw and why would he make a game without necrophilia in it: David: 02 5589, David Cage speaking. TGAM: Yo

The people who are actually excited about Mirror's Edge

In no particular order: Electronic Arts. People who didn't get the memo about free running "the fad" being over. 15-17 year old skateboarders. EDGE magazine until it's rated [6] even after such a glowing preview article. PS3 owners who don't yet realise it is multiplatform. Review Based on Wikipedia Page It had so much potential but despite promises is very linear and frustrating. The camera isn't quite FPS perspective which leads to some odd moments where arms are inexplicably long. Animations of legs and looking at the floor the whole time grates. 6/10

Once you go fat, you never look back!

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You can't. It is physically impossible. Anyway TGAM are going to wade into the cluster fuck bandwagon about some game where the job is to rescue a fat princess. It's by Sony or some shit. Anyway the low down is here and here . It turns out that some parties are upset because it depicts a fat woman or something along those lines. That is such a lazy line to take especially when we are judging from press releases and screenshots. Here are some further (and frankly better) complaints to make so that everyone can jump on this bandwagon and rail against evil sony, catering the whinge to whatever floats ones boat. 1) Fat Princess is racist both the titular princess and the katamari dude are white. What? Asians can't be princesses? Blacks can't be fat? Racist filth etc. etc. 2) Fat Princess is ageist. The princess looks young. What? Old people can't be princesses? Babies can't be princesses? 3) Fat Princess is sexist. The princess looks like a woman. What?

Soul Calibur XXX

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WEWT! In Soul Calibur you can customize your character right down to the underwear ! Though I do wonder for my sexuality, I saw this picture and the first thing i thought was, "Ooooh those icons kinna look like WoW icons." Fig. 1. Power - Some sword from the Warrior talent tree. Fig. 2. Impact - Some shieldy talent. Fig. 3. Boost - Sheath of Light, Paladin talent Fig. 4. Gauge - Spirally green thing Fig. 5. Special - Primal Mana innit Namco... We're watching you. Richie X

A special holiday message from Jill Valentine

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To all those people who have just woken up from an 8, 20, 32 or 44 month coma. Here's Jill Valentine wishing you merry christmas! Thanks the internet! Thanks Jill! Next on TGAM! Happy VJ day and welcome to the 21st Century for those who have had comas for a very long time.

Warning new term approaching: Underboob

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It is not full on boob, It's not cleavage, It's... UNDERBOOB Coming to a System near you soon!

TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever: Number 48

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Time for number 48! Excited? I know I am really excited. Here's a clue to the game via an excellent screenshot from Eurogamer. Yes it's Dead Rising (referred to as Dead Rizzling in TGAM circles thanks to a stupid customer). Why so low? Nobody asks. Well it's a compormise, I love Dead Rising but Richie has no time for it. So it's here. The first proper game on the list. Dead Rising has everything: zombies, shopping malls, hot fat lesbo cops, ban in Germany, Jills Sandwiches, everyday violence, cults, guns, storyline, hideous save system, unreadable text, the Dante, Jill and Ryu zombies, cars, viruses and tits mcgee (never forget tits Mcgee). The usual capcom trappings of being a bit confusing on the first playthrough and the aforementioned save system only work to make it better in our eyes. Perhaps the greatest achievement is that the game works properly. So if you feel so inclined you can sit on the roof for the whole game until the chopper arrives*. It still remains t

Next week on TGAM

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In order to belatedly celebrate our 2nd birthday and Capcom's 25th birthday and because there is nothing happening in games at all we're going to sell out like IGN and do TGAM top 25 no a top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever. To shake up the usual format we're going to start at number 50 and work our way through until we get to number 1. Then we're going to stop and do other posts. Given our recent activity levels this will probably take 38 years because we'll lose enthusiasm after number 47. So don't just sit around wanking over big brother for the next 38 years. Instead start pointless forum posts hypothesising about who is going to be number 11. Write a letter to EDGE when we include Final Fantasy XI but not VI or VII! Try to convince us to put any Zelda or Metroid* games in the list. You even have your chance to vote** for the top ten in this list so try to get all those underated multimillion selling games like Ico

Captain Falco Whoring Himself Out

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Nintendo are allegedly very displeased.

Dead Fantasy

Watch: And watch some more: Now sit back, slightly hollow inside, knowing that you will probably never see anything more awesome in your life ever.

Front Magazine's Steve Beech: An Interview

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Hey all, After getting really excited about Front Magazine's great work on the Devil May Cry Images, we decided to get some input from the great minds behind these genius works of art! So we spoke with Front magazine's Art Director: Steve Beech Where did the idea for replacing Dante and Nero with a female model come from? Well, we were approached by the lovely people at Capcom after they saw a similar project we did for Call of Duty 4 and they just asked so nicely we couldn’t say no. Are you a fan of the Devil May Cry series? To be honest I am not a big gamer (although a lot of the staff here are) even though I have worked on a few gaming titles in the past, but I generally like the whole look of the game as I love Manga films and thought that I could get that energy across with the lovely Vikki Blows. What do you think of Devil May Cry 4? I think it looks like a really slick game, and the graphics and artwork kick ass. Are you an Xbox 360 man or a PS3 man? I pl

George Romero vs. Capcom. The company line

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Kotaku reports here and here that The MKR Group, who hold the rights to George Romero films, is suing Capcom for similarities between Dead Rising and Dawn of The Dead. This is a sad day indeed, hopefully Capcom will come up trumps but I have my doubts and so do all our buddies at Capcom HQ who as we speak are burning all their production notes, we managed to photocopy some of them before they were destroyed. But fear not! Either way Capcom wins! If the law suit fails then hopefully Capcom will make infinity more Dead Risings set in malls. If the law suit is a success then Capcom can successfully sue any bastard who makes a game or film that includes the following: Bad voice acting and zombies Zombies Elephants Zombie Sharks Zombie Crocodiles Zombies in a Zoo Zombies in a mansion Zombies in a police station Zombies in Arklay mountains Zombies on a train Zombies on an underground train Zombies on a tram Zombies on an island Zombies in a military facility Zombie dog

Devil May Cry 4: Best. Cosplay. Ever.

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Seth over at the Capcom blog has found some real gems! Front Magazine has done some rather original photo shoots involving the DMC characters but with (semi-naked) girls instead! The magazine will be published on 1st March with all the pics, including some nudey ones!!! Thatguys.co.uk will be all over this, expect some NSFW post in the near future. Kudos Front, Kudos... laters, Richie X

Pushing the PC gaming boundaries

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The BBC has this nice little article about how PCs are better at games than consoles or some such. I don't really know as I haven't fully read it as my attention span only lasts for a paragraph before I'm bored. But I got the gist. All I do know is that whatever you may think about PCs, the people that play them are GEEKS. Nerdo-rama. They wear big rimmed glasses and have braces. They don't have sex either. They just beat off over video game characters who sex with other dead video game characters (see above Fahrenheit ). Some guy from Nvidia says: "It's absolute nonsense to think that consoles are at the cutting edge," Yeah but only fucking nerds buy your shitty graphics cards and that clearly isn't enough. That's why you put those little leaflets in every single one of Future Publishing's console oriented magazines going on and on about how Nvidia is the future and good. BTW Nvidia, those leaflets are shit. Purely because PC games are

Resident Evil: Wnakery

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There comes a time in every blogs life, when all the rantings, drivel, and fantasies actually pay off! You remember “Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within”, do you remember the feeling you felt when it was first coming out, when you though it was going to be everything “Final Fantasy: Advent Children” was? Well it’s that time again except it not Squeenix its… CAPCOM, and instead of Final fantasy it’s RESIDENT FUCKING EVIL Now I know that Resident evil has not had the best track record at the cinema, with that pissy trilogy, of defiled characters, and tainted plotlines. But this time Sony (You better not pull a PS3 on this one, you fucks) and Capcom are copulating in the hope of conceiving a CG Movie. Of Resident evil proportions Catch all the news here. What we want to see in Biohazard: Degeneration or we will actually start to MDK people starting with whoever is the nearest. This is the definitive list any slight variation and it's curtains for everyone. 1) Jill, Chri

Thith meanth war......

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On saturday night just gone, I found myself with a free evening. And due to the absolute fantastic quality of British television on Saturday nights I thought I might, you know, play some videogames so I could do a proper post on my video games blog. Now because I'm still feeling like this I ended up playing both Animal Crossing and Animal Crossing Wild World. Suffice to say everyone was majorly pissed off with me because I haven't been to Gaylando in over 400 days (see a post coming soon) but they are a fickle peoples and after a little bit of talking to everyone my peeps seemed happy, neigh, almost pleased to see me again. Including my virtual stalker target Bunnie . However, whilst chatting with my love she showed me this "weird" letter (her words): Now I assure you that this is an image of a letter but a crappy phone camera combined with an old DS resulted in the above image. For those of you who can't make out the text! or those of you who can't

Another letter to Team Ninja

69 Thatguys Street Racoon City T6 4M1 Dear Team Ninja, Firstly I would like to thank you on your wondrous attention to detail, and on encapsulating everything that anyone could every want from bouncing CG boobs. However, it pains me to say that this is not a letter complementing your hold on the CG boob market, this is in fact a letter of apology. You may have recently received a letter from my colleague, a Mrs Lvl 70 Richie complaining that her phone was broken due to the rage caused by your game being too 'hard'. However, I implore you to ignore the demands set out in my colleague's previous letter because, well she plays WoW and she just isn't used to real time combat systems or skill based games. She spent hours playing DoA 4 Online desperately trying to "click" on opponents before endlessly being beaten. In fact, it was only recently that Richie learned that DoA had a game element to it at all. She would just sit watching the rolling demo screens at

A Letter to Team Ninja

69 Thatguys Street Racoon City T6 4M1 Dear Team Ninja, Firstly I would like to thank you on your wondrous attention to detail, and encapsulated everything that anyone could every want from bouncing CG boobs. However it pains me to say that this is not a letter complimenting your hold on the CG boob market, this is in fact a letter demanding compensation for damaging my phone. If it were not for your bouncy booby game (RE: Dead or alive 4) being to ridiculously hard for the entry level player, then my phone would not have met with a rather unfortunate event, involving a wall and it hurtling though the air. As such I would like to demand the repair bill for my phone refunded to me (£40), emotional damages (£1000), a nude patch for Ein, damn! I mean Bayman. No! I mean Tengu. NO! I mean Helena… Maybe. Along with this I demand that Cunzy and I feature as characters in the next DoA game, and we each have multiple endings involving us nobbing the DoA girls. Cunzys, can feature him, settling d