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Chortle

Been playing a lot of SSBB recently and this video really struck a chord. Gotta love Captain Falcon even if you hate his games.

No Matter if you're Black or White

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As everyone knows by now Resident Evil 5 is coming to both the Xbox 360 and the PlayStation 3. This week capcom announced some of the DLC which will be available for specific versions. We've gots the lowdown here mofos: Xbox 360 1000mp Resident Evil 1 Rocket launcher. If you don’t purchase this then upon start up you are faced with the “you are dead” screen from the end of the PlayStation Resident Evil 1. Because there was no rocket launcher Chris died at the end of RE. Buying this content means that Chris didn’t die and you can play Resident Evil 5 as per usual. 450mp Training for Chris. After purchasing this content Chris can fire weapons and throw grenades without risk of hurting himself, fumbling reloads or turning the safety on and off. 200mp Lemsip for Chris. Upon purchasing this, Chris will stop occasionally sniffling or complaining about having a “stuffy head”. 300mp Zombies. Buying this content unlocks an extra zombie at the beginning of the second secti

Lets join that Bandwagon

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Yes! This seasons bandwagon is four player vs. lots of enemies jobbies. A couple of seasons ago it was vehicles in FPS and the season before it was war games set in Vietnam. Left 4 Dead, Horde mode in Gears of War 2 and the recently announced zombie mode in CoD:WaW have all recently been announced. Basically it's 4 player co-op vs. waves of things meaning players have to co-operate rather than fight against each other or be on each others teams but not really co-operate. Suspiciously, I should say, that these three games have all spontaneously come up with this idea. Is this innovation? Did we really have to wait until this gen to do these things? The answer to both of those questions is no. Basically, it's a bit of inspiration from Serious Sam, Timesplitters 2 Arcade challenges and virus mode and Project Eden mixed in with a bit of zombie love that has become the flavour of this dev cycle. Sure, it's a nice feature but we'll all be bored to death of it after th

When will blogger be working again?

Blogger is currently broken. Which means you can't see our brilliant yet succinct posts and we can't even upload images we stole from the internet to illustrate posts that you the reader cannot see anyway. Unless you can see this post and the two below it, with pictures in which case, it has been fixed. Ignore the above, the below and the on the same line(s) as this sentence. We're taking bets on when it will be fixed but unfortunately none of you will be able to bet by the very nature of the problem caused and the subject of the subsequent bet. Good luck! WHEN WILL BLOGGER BE FIXED?: 1-45 Never. 1 Five minutes before the world succumbs to some kind of apocalypse event resulting in the loss of electricity for 50 or so years. 100-1 October 2008. 5-1 November 2008. Place your bets now kids!

Survival Horror...

...It's a bit of a dead genre. Pun intended.

Joined up thinking

Kotaku has the scoop, but the news that Left 4 Dead will have the cheevo "Zombie Genocidest" whereby you have to wipeout 53,595 zombies (one more zombie than Dead Rising's Zombie Genocide achievement) makes us smile. Well done Valve, have a cookie. Let's just hope Capcom don't sue.

The State of Play

For all the imploring for games to become more mainstream and "accepted", for all the essays by pretentious hacks trying to read more into gaming than is necessary, for all the protests and for all the forum threads that go on for years about the best characters or the top ten...... For all the social and political commentators bigging up the merits of games for education and art. For all those and more it must be pretty galling to see that Pro Evo just knocked FIFA off the top sales spot. That's right, for all your whinging and whining about games the meatheads have it. The yearly update to a football game is what most real people are interested in. A game about a game where unnaturally shaven millionaires play football against each other. Unlucky.

*Sigh*

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This image from site we don't normally look at, Joystiq makes us sad. The top is the PS3 version and the bottom one is the Wii version. Looks like Sony tried to ruin it by making all the zombies grey like they're Solid Snake or something. Or a new PSN update or something. Or a sequel to Killzone or something. The Wii version looks terrible too. Too many zombies. I hope they scale that back before launch. Plus for all those Xbox 360 people laughing at other consoles only getting Dead Rising now at least we'll be able to read the fucking text man and it has multiplayer but they left that out of the press release. We have our sources though.

Omastar Comics #20

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According to the dictionary, apathy is worse than murder. At our recent book group, this issue came up and it was one that went right to the heart of our old friend Omastar. For years he toiled away in underwater caves thinking about how to cure apathy. He thought really hard. Somedays he would think so hard he would need to go for a swim or have a lay down in order to relax. Then, the cure came to him in a dream one night. We were lucky enough to be there on the scene when he cured the world of apathy thus bumping murder a little bit up the list of bad things. Here it is: Wow, that Omastar, what a guy.

Yes! TEKKEN 6

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Hi guys! We're going to take time out of our regularly updated TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever to bring you this very very exciting news: It's bifs again! But not just bifs filth seekers it's Tekken 6 bifs. Tekken is a great game and for those young 'uns who don't remember it here is how the series went: Tekken 2: The series was so crazy it didn't even start at 1! Tekken 2 was a mashup of your favourite childhood toys, Lego, and your favourite beat em 'up game, Street Fighter. But it was better than Street Fighter because there was no fighting! There was never any contact, contestants just hit each other with neon fireworks until one of them gets tired or something. It was successful and on the PlayStation. Not even the PSOne yet! Tekken 3: This was Tekken 2 but with a cheaty character introduced to the series. Tekken 4: See Tekken 2. Tekken 5: See Tekken 3. Tekken 6: See Tekken 5 plus " swe

You are probably here looking for filth.

Yes you are aren't you? If you are the three people that came here yesterday looking for "soul calibur xxx" you probably want to go here or here . If you are the people desperate to find the "devil may cry 4 front mag" stuff you should go here . For the person looking for jay haffling, presumably Jay himself, go here . For the sicko who was looking for people with viagra naked, I would refine your search a bit first and the sad soul looking for porn guy blogger, we presume you didn't find them here. Disappointing people, disappointing. Where is the imagination? Where are the searches for Guy Cocker or Naked Bif ? We've got baby death and all kind of things to put into any orifice of choice . Boobs you want boobs? We got boobs in various flavours, WoW , Resident Evil Underboob (neathage) to mention but a mere few. We got spluff the biscuit going on too. You're not even googling terms like Red & White Bum Marmite and Green and bloody douche

Meatspace.

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You may ask when is a good time to use the word 'meatspace' instead of terms like 'the real world' of 'the physical world'. The answer is never, children, never. You never need to use it and any time you do, attractive girls and normal guys with jobs, cars, pensions and mortgages laugh at you and point at you and call you Urkel and do the things with the fingers to make glasses over their eyes. Then you'll probably make a webcomic where you kill the attractive girls and normal guys with a Buster sword and all your forum friends will send you emoticons until your inner balance is restored. You may also ask when is a good time to use the word 'meatspace' to refer to female nether regions. There isn't really a good time to use that word in that context either I am afraid. To reiterate, nobody should ever use the word meatspace. I have preemptively written to the OED to tell them to take meatspace out of their dictionaries or us and the lads

Why do you always find things in the last place you look?*

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*Is it because you stop looking or is it because the press coverage runs out?

Next-next gen? Hold up....

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Anyone (unlike us) with their finger on the pulse on video games these days might be excited with all the buzz around what the future holds for next--next gen. There's a new DS (no GBA slot!?), updates for the 360 and a host of expensive clip ons and add ons for the Wii. RUmours are also abound that Little Big Planet and Home might, you know, get released. You may be excited but were certainly aren't. What happened to last and this gen? The PS2 and the GBA, two fine formats still found in many many houses have been all but ditched commercially. Try it. Go to your nearest game shop and try to find some of the classics for these two formats. You probably won't find anything at all. If you are lucky you might find a copy of Okami or a battered copy of Pokemon Emerald in amongst the shovelware shit that Ubisoft insists on churning out for the all but abandoned platforms. And what for this gen? The choice for each platform is still hugely underwhelming, each consoles has a

RAM RAIDER EXCLUSIVE! PC ZONE WALKOUT

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Exclusive from the legendary RAM RAIDER! There has been a walkout at PC Zone magazine! A guy, a guy and some other guy and another guy have walked out leaving the Future Publishing magazine in potential jeopardy! We asked our source in the heart of Future Publishing some questions surrounding the ordeal: Us: So what is a "PC". Our source: Umm it's like a machine for making books and graphs. Us: Oh. Okay. So what was the magazine about? Our secret source whose name shall never be revealed: It was about how to write good books and to make cool graphs and to print out labels for CDs and shit. Us: Shit. And why the walkout at the magazine? Our super spy inside the actual heart of the "enemy" in between the valves: I think someone accidentally printed out a graph on the wrong side of some glossy paper and someone called it the worst F*****g graph they ever saw. Us: Damn man! So what is the future for the magazine? Our source: Both readers of the

Heavy Rain the paper cut killer

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There is hype abound fellow sailors. Hypery and balderdashery truth be told! It surrounds a game called Heavy Rain: The Metro killer. Many of you will have seen The Casting , a full motion video used to show the full body and facial motion capture techniques used to show the full range of emotions that most games still struggle to show. Emotions like "crying" and "angry crying" and "crying because you didn't put the bin out again". Many of you may know that this game will be the next game from David "shagged a dead guy" Cage, the previous game was Fahrenheit and it involved a woman who shagged a dead guy. What The Casting and previous press releases fail to tell you about this new game is that there will not be any shagging of dead guys in this game. We phoned David Cage to ask him why this wasn't mentioned in any preview we saw and why would he make a game without necrophilia in it: David: 02 5589, David Cage speaking. TGAM: Yo

360 Miis

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Over the weekend we had a hands on ( this time ) with the Xbox 360 Mii creator. Unlike Spore, the system is unbelievably flexible for avatar creation and this application is a great way to pretend you have a Wii without so much as spending a penny! We made this as our first avatar: See how easy it is! Then we got creative and made this one: Ha ha har! All our British Xbox friends are gonna laugh so hard when they see this on the 360 version of Home when it comes out (due out November 2009)! Unfortunately due to video games and television stunting our imagination we literally couldn't think of another avatar to make that wasn't already a videogame character. We tried to make mario but around the time we got to adding the tits the microsoft execs looked at us and shook their heads very slowly. In summary then, this could be the tool to bring the Xbox 360 out of the stinky underground and to the masses. I'm not too sure how much we are allowed to say about an

Series of games that need to stop

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With the recent """excitement""" around Megaman 9, thatguys would formally like to register a list of series that should just stop. In the alleged billion dollar game industry it is time to reallocate some of the money from employing people to 'make shit shiny' and 'copy what Halo did' to coming up with some new IP. That's right Nintendo, I'm looking at you! Series that should have stopped a long time ago: Megaman- Lets be fair, everyone since the first one has been the same. Come on Capcom. Zelda- Ditto Metroid- Yuh huh Pokemon- Same Halo- Lets just hope that three was the last remake of one. Resident Evil- See above. Tomb Raider- Should have left it after the first one. C&C, Warcraft, Starcraft, Diablo- All four of these games haven't changed in over twenty seven years. Every Mario game- If you have a SNES that still works there has been pretty much no reason to buy a new Nintendo console. Fallout

9/11 Conspiracy Bush Obama Viagra Naked

Apologies for the brash and somewhat gratuitous Post title. But we at Thatguys are very aware that our traffic has been increasing, as much as we would like to think there are actual people out there that think, "man these guys are informative ironic and funny". Deep down part of us knows that through pure persistence, much like a kid constantly screaming for attention from their mother, people are just coming back to us. WTF people who are you? what do you do? do you like us? do you hate us? did you vote for bum in willy or willy in bum? We wanna know... Tell us what you think... Take 2 seconds from your day, get off your high horse and leave a comment.. Love and hugs, Richie X.

Breaking News!

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In case you missed the TV-adverts, radio spots, advertorials, news features, interviews with Will Wright, selling out sponsorship on every gaming blog, magazine adverts and zeitgeist "Sporn" articles then you read it here first, Spore is out. We have had an exclusive hands off playthrough with both the DS version and the lesser known PC version. You won't find another hands off exclusive like this anywhere else! Spore Creatures for Nintendo DS. Many companies release fully fledged games for the proper consoles then release some half-arsed watered down version on the DS. All the publicity and the marketing for the proper versions means that many people buy the DS version on good faith only to find that it is a steaming pile of GBA shite. Spore Creatures for the DS is one of these games. Imagine, if you will, a watered down version of pokemon put through the Fossil League Dinosaur Tournament Championship filter and then whisked together lightly for twenty minutes wit