That guy's a Maniac...

Yeah so my Journalism Project? Well what I was doing was applying to Edge . R ecently Kotaku announced that edge were hiring so, I though t what the hell, despite its numerous spelling mistakes, I ' ll call thatguys my portfolio. At the very least I was aiming to get a trip to their offices in Bath, that way we can all w na k over how obscure the Japanese are, whilst discussing the " Uncanny Valley " in a mild yet pretentious tone. The things I was supposed to have: 1) Excellent writing ability, with an enthusiasm for grammar, research and structure as well as for expressing your opinion and communicating your passion . " O ne word, Wnak " 2) An in-depth knowledge of videogaming, its history, and its culture . " Dude, check the site! We still play P S 1 games! And I can get 96 worlds complete in Super Mario World on the SNES in one sitting. 3) A real curiosity to fill any gaps in that in-depth knowledge. " Yeah I

Hey guys, girls and gaymers. It's paradox gaming time! That's right, where you the reader get to change the future by answering some hypothetical questions about games. Add your answers in the comments and I'll put them up here. 1) Would you pay £500 to be able to play one game for a month. It could be any game at all. Think of your favourite game, would you willingly pay £500 to play it? Cunzy1 1: My favourite game of all time is probably Timesplitters 2, TGAM Game of the Year 2006. I don't think I would pay £500 to play it for a month though. I'd wait until it was cheap or free. 2) Would you pay £500 to play NHL 2K7? Cunzy1 1: Hah! Fuck off. I've already got a NHL game. You only ever need one. It's like football games. No. Never. 3) Would you pay £500 to add a massive block of plastic to the already tight space under your TV. THe piece of plastic does nothing except play NHL 2K7? Cunzy1 1: No. I need the space for my PS2 which can play all the Playsttion

Bored of the GH2 songs yet? Lemmie suggest to you Freezepop - Less talk more Rok . It's one of the bonus tracks, and it kick ass. buy it, play it, master it, love it

Hey kids! Its been a while, but I'm currently working on a wee journalism project of which i hope to fill you all in on in the next few days. In the mean time i would like to dispell some of the rumours that have been flying about Richie Possibly taking up playing World of Warcarft. I can place all your minds at ease an tell you that i did not sucumb to the temptations of the burning cursade, and i have not started World of Warcarft. UPDATE: Richie has been playing WoW for ages now. Alas! He is dead to us now. Gone. It's a tragic end to the second greatest videogame blog writing duo of all time. I was invited to his funeral. Here was his eulogy given by me Cunzy1 1 last week. "Never the most attractive woman, he was good at clicking a mouse button. Well I say good. SOmetimes he would miss it but he would try really really hard. He was never that good at most other games. Except, no. No I just remembered he was pretty shit at that too. But ummm. Yeah. If you have any ideas

Hi, my name is Cunzy1 1 and I have an axe to grind. I'm going to spout my point of view as fact and back it up with misinformation and uninformed hearsay. Today, I've got an issue with kids reading books, especially homoerotic books about wizards and dragons and the such. Gone are the days when children would come home from school, play a few rounds of Quake 2 with their friends and then sit and talk to each other over a nice dinner between friends and families. These days kids are obsessed with reading books about 'wizards' who use 'majicks' to 'save the day'. They are becoming mindless zombies sat tranfixed with words on a page barely moving save to turn a page or to 'shoot up' some heroin which they learned from another book about drug abuse. People in bookshops don't care, they rarely check ID when the lazy slob children come in to buy the next installment of Manly McMan's book about shooting and killing real people from nearly real

And not "Con" as in Convention, "Con" as in the UK is being fucked over. I'm Privy to a little information, and it is information that i feel should be more common knowledge. Have you ever wondered why consoles cost so much more over here? Well, its all to do with Tax. The consoles get taxed much more here than in places like Japan and the US. Why is this? Well its all to do with how consoles are classified, to this day consoles are classified as VCRs, and the reason VCR's are taxed so heavily is because of their ability to record television. In this day and age this is archaic, hell even at the time it was stupid! As if your fucking NES could record TV. Stupid, Just Stupid. And you know that the government won't change this, nor will they make it common knowledge because they are getting our money! Think about that when you go out to buy your PS3, don't think that it's just Sony Shafting you Mr Blair is too. That's right a Governmental-Corp

Richie and I have been dealing with a big court case at the moment because of this post so we haven't been able to blog about Fifa 07 or the latest fake WoW :( . However, you may remember that Chuff_72 was doing an important mission , as a maniac, but on behalf of all gamerkind (That's you readers). Have you tried to buy a game in real life recently? I'm not talking about the brand newest games I'm talking about old games that have been out for a fortnight or something? Impossible! Mr.Game only sells 5 types of EA game so where do we go to buy the underated classics like Tomb Raider 3 or Resident Evil Code Veronica X? We go to the Indie stores, at least in theory we do. I would argue that if game developers want to sell their games they should make sure their games stay in fucking stores for longer than a week. Chuff_72 went to scope out the game shops in Europe's capital city, London. London must sell some ace games right? Right? Here are his findings in one big c

Here in the good old U of K it is snowing. In England (Scotland can handle snow and no-one has heard from Wales for years) when it snows everything breaks. Trains, cars, airplanes, TV reception, Everything. However, Lady and Gentlemens even though we are currently all snowed in, with only a couple of cans of Heinz Beanz for sustinence until Spring, wonder-commentor and Honorary Hardcore Maniac, Chuff_72 has written the world's first review of Lost Planet to coincide with more than a little bit of snow in England's capital. THIS IS THE FIRST TIME IT HAS HAPPENED PEOPLE, you saw it here first* Take it away Chuffter: "Is it cool to tell yourself, "I told you so"? I watched all the video's, downloaded all the demos and masturbated over my copy of EDGE, yet at the back of my mind there was a feeling that there was something wrong with this slice of arcade pie... To begin with I followed the crowd, the Dr ( Dr Wo 69, also a stalwart Maniac and long term gamer. He

We've all been playing a game when suddenly the phone rings or the smoke from the kitchen reaches your nose and you have to run out of the room to deal with the situation. With the fire abated you return to your unpaused game to find, nothing much has happened...... You still finished the race and you weren't in last, the gaggle of Stormtroopers failed to even take you down to half life. That's right kids! I'm talking about lazy game design . It must have happened to you, when you realise that if you play a particular game by running through trying to pull off awesome combos you will die once or twice but if you walk slowly just using kick you still reach the end with full health. For me, this really ruins a game, destroying the illusions that a) You were any good at the game in the first place and b) That the virtual world you are is one full of unique characters not mindless robots programmed to run up to you and try to kill you. How many set pieces do you know that

So this arrived in the post today! Now all I need is a computer that can run it. Stupid PC gaming. Still, in the event of the end of the world I can travel from town to town scrounging tractor batteries to run top of the range PCs and I don't have to worry about finding the game. I'm going to put this game and all my other dinosaur games in a bullet proof CD case and carry them on me at all times just in case the end of the world happens. On that note, I'm now cheating on That Guy's a Maniac with my new blog Cunzy11'sdinosaursingames blog. I'm going to be the world's leading expert on dinosaurs in games and co-author of the World's Second Greatest Videogame Blog! Just see if I ain't....... In other, non-dinosaur related news, Chuff_72 , long time commentor, member of Catch the Monkeys and other Games B69 and guest writer is on a mission to discover London's greatest game stores. Here's a sneak preview of his antics on Saturday, t

Oh Sick! Its that time of year again, where you cry at home and watch the Brit awards, whilst all of the other happy couples are out grind questing in Outlands to level 70 with their Gamertag sharing partner. But what about all those happy couples? getting that Epic flying mount is gonna take longer than 1 day of romance, what you need is Richie's Valentine's day guide to gaming. So you and your partner are gamers, what do you do for Valentine's day? to share those special "hobbies" you both enjoy. Here are a few suggestions: 1. Strip Warioware. This is a fairly timid yet, sure fire way to get some nudity, fast. The premise is simple you play warioware, either for Game cube, Wii, GBA, or DS link-up, each time a player loses to their partner the lose an item of clothing, simple. This can also be played for shots, if you are trying ease the partner into suggesting a strip version, It can also be played for sexual forfeits. "Ok, if you win this one, I'll le

Yesterday, Long Time TGAM Commentor and occassional guest writer Chuff_72 said: "OH SIIIICCCKKKKKKK someone on this blog is planning on getting ALL the games with dinos in... try and guess who everybody. Anyways, that means he/she is gonna have to buy Splashdown 2! There's even a dino on the back of the frikin box! SIIICCCKKKKKKK!!!!" and "SSSSIIIIIIICCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!! I forgot John Woo Presents Stranglehold, not only dinos but in a FRIKIN MUSEUM!!!!! Another reason to get a 360...Homophobe for dinosaurs." It's true readers. I'm giving up on trying to collect all the games I would like in my games collection. The sad truth is I just don't have time to play them all and I know that one day soon I'm going to lose a cable, lead or accessory which means some of my old consoles are going to have to be put down. For good. Nothing but museum pieces. Until then I'm going to try to get every game that has featured dinosaur

At the risk of becoming the dinosaurs in videogames blog there's more news on Next Gen dinosaurs. How can you the readers treat the World's Second Best Videogame blog like this? Essentially you should head over to good old gamespot (you could go to IGN but it's a waste of time) here and watch the video for the 360 version of Turok. It looks spanky, but it is essentially a concept trailer. Tee last shot of the trailer is awesome. I'll be honest I was never a fan of the turok series. The N64 was always shit for FPS. Turok 2 was a good laugh. You could play as a dinosaur! But look at it: It's classic next-gen, see here for a more in depth guide to making things next gen. Lots of bump and some anti aliasing- check , make it realistic, add more brown- check , make it dark- check , add some bloom- check. I'm saving up my pennies right now so I can buy a 360 just for this game which is due out Q3 2007 in the US so probably sometime July 2009 in Europe. It

I've noticed our site has had a massive increase in readers in recent days. Massive. I've also received a lot of complaints regarding the in jokey nature of the site so a bit of back story may be needed for those new readers. In which case, read the archives and come back. For everyone else (Chuff_72). Why did nobody tell me about this? What kind of readers are you? You're supposed to be the World's Second Best Video Game Blog Readers. Shame on all of you. Watch this It's perhaps the greatest concept for a game in the world ever and we should all be buying things like this right now. Don't hesitate. We need to support the dinosaur based video games industry. If we had to be the Official Nintendo Magazine we'd say it looks like a cross between Dino Riders, Warcraft II and Grand Theft Auto London. Okay so Gamespot gives it a less than average 6. But look at it! Amazing and it's educational, Boris Johnson, because it has dinosaurs, vikings and ninjas. Perso

Webcomics. There are a gazillion out there, done by horrible Indie types who probably live in San Francisco, they probably have cats and they probably are responsible for the AIDS . They are mostly about love, excuses to draw boobies or to show off to the world how much stuff the "artist" knows. Amongst the plethora of webcomics there are a tiny fraction about our favourite subject- Videogames. 98% of them however, are either sprite comics comme ca or ones titled " Two Noobs and a Gaymer " or "Just Another Gaming Comic". I've scoured all of these and they are without doubt awful and as the World's Second Best Videogame Blog it's time to play key service to those truly outstanding ones, or the ones that everyone thinks are outstanding. Then we will crown our Queen, the World's Best Videogame Webcomic. NB although our Queen sounds better because we are Second Best and she is the best, this isn't actually the case because webcomics a

Hey Kids, I have been working on a little project, And its fucking Mental/Amazing! There's a little known site out there called Score Hero and well on the front i would guess it is a place for people out there to measure peoples scores/penis' against one and other create leagues against one and other generally, i suppose, it is just one of those "Online Community" sites. However this site hides a great and wondrous secret. In the forums section there is a sub-section called "Homebrew Projects" Now the tag line for this section is " Discussion about Guitar Mods, Wireless Projects" . Where some of this may be true, Its not the golden Holy grail of this section,.Personally I am not bothered by some Stupid-faced loser defacing his limited edition 1972 Fender Expensocaster signed by Elvis and Modding it to be a guitar hero controller. No, the real Holy Grail is a forum sticky called " Idiot Proof Guide to playing custom made songs in GH2. &

Hey gang, since 2006 we've had, literally, infinite emails from some of our traditionally stalwart readers asking "Why should we stick with you phags? Your site sucks?". We hired a consultancy team to have a look but then we remembered that we didn't actually do that at all. We then tried to examine this question ourselves but we ended up laughing too much. We were pretty funny back in the old days. So I, Cunzy1 1, took it upon myself to use the internet to find out why you, the reader, should stick with us (all 6 of you). I googled "ask jeeves" (which is now just 'ask'. The Jeeves bit was probably judged to be homophobic). I then asked Jeeves "What other videogame blogs are there?". This , dearest friends, is what you could be reading instead* Result 1 (and 2) Fucking IGN. Nobody reads IGN, their sole purpose is to come first and second in any search with the word game in it. We didn't even click on these because both links were