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Showing posts with the label Laughable

Legend of Zelda Twiglet Princess

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This is not the exciting exclusive announcement we announced in yesterday's announcement announcement.

Last week we were grumble grumble grumble grots about the new Legend of Zelda game. This is not fitting of the World's Second Greatest Video Game Blog of all time as proved by SCIENCE. So we're going to man up and give it a shot. We're comfortable enough in our sexualities to admit when we may have been hasty or wrong. In fact, I might really enjoy throwing boomerangs or throwing those pathetic little bombs about?

This evening, along with fellow LoZ hater and extremely occassional contributor Chuff_72 we've decided to give Legend of Zelda Twiglet Princess a go. It is only fair. Apparently, this lady is in it?


Why doesn't she wear shoes? We might even live blog it. We say 'might' because we might not get past the first five minutes if Link insists on making that horrible noise he makes. Then that wouldn't make for a great blog at all.

Watch Tonight!

From the Graudian

Gameswipe With Charlie Brooker 10pm BBC4

Following in the footsteps of Screenwipe, Charlie Brooker's new show- you guessed it- aims its remote at the world of videogames. Whether you're a gamer hater or lover, Gameswipe- part of the Electric Revolution season on BBC4- shows how games can be just as dumb or brilliant as TV and movies. And Charlie certainly knows what he's talking about, having spent his early career causing mayhem at PC Zone. Graham Lineham, Dara O'Brian and Dom Joly are on hand to join in the pixellated fun.

Thoughts on the bit from the Guardian:

1) TV and Movie envy :(
2) Gamer hater or lover? Surely this should be game hater or lover? Who loves gamers?
3) Would have left out the bit about PC Zone, most people think that is a shop where you buy printers.
4) With the exception of Graham Linehan funny men from elsewhere on TV have no place here.
5) Videogame rather than video game? Controversial.
6) Forgot to mention the guys from Videogaiden, …

Brute Update 28/04/2009 FINAL

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Fuck it!

I remained patient, I thought it may be a fun thing to track the progress or out little virtual thatguys.

But I cant be fucked with it any more!

Constant error pages

Thatguys brute... R.I.P.

Cheers to all of you that supported us.
Richie

Little Sales, Big Joke

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Of course I am talking about LittleBigPlanet. Remember the hype? The endless conference videos showing the game, Kotaku, GameSpot and every other popular gaming blog totally selling out to Media molecule? Those annoying videos where someone recreated another game in LBP, a game that you could probably by on the virtual console anyway? Did anyone see the akward TV spots?


This is egg on the face of all those with high hopes for this "game" and ultimately a sign that a game like LBP may be great in an office full of game journalists with a shared PS3 but for the average joe? It seems that Mario Kart Wii will do fine.
So where does this leave the PS3? Pretty much all the stuff that was due for launch finally came out and it all came out with a poof! Rather than a bang. Is anyone even playing MGS4? No, thought not. Resistance 2 and Resistance? HA! Ummm... Home? Oh not out yet. So much for killer aps.
Looks like the 360 fanboys won the skirmish, battle and war. Just in time for thei…

Impressions.

This weekend I had a chance to catch up with two new games on the Xbox 360, the alleged "real console". Saying that will make PS3 owners scoff, Wii owners laugh in their gazillions and PC owners head straight to their favourite forum to rat me out for the console loving luddite they expect me to be. Turning on the spot is over rated any case. Anyway, as we are in the midst of the winter of good games after the seemingly eternal summer of absolutely shit games I was anxious to try out two of the games I was particularly looking forward to.
Gears of War 2. DANGER DANGER! SPOILERS IF YOU COULDN'T GUESS THE GIST ANYWAY Having enjoyed Gears of War after it came out and long after most Xbox 360 owners had changed their 20 second attention towards something else a little bit different (Does anyone even play Halo 3 anymore?) I was looking forward to the second one. I'd read a bit about it and Cliffy B spouting off about the story and it being, bigger and better etc. etc. The …

Diablo players: Busting the myths

That's not what we're going to do here children. No sir. You see, the group: "gamers" can be divided up into neat little slices and everyone within a particular slice demonstrates exactly the same behaviours and acts in a similar way. Schools in America and "the man" will have you believe that we are all different. We're not. Most of us can be neatly pigeonholed and our every behaviour predicted from a mile away. "Diablo players" is the name of one such pigeonhole-slice as is "gays" and "the sikhs"*. So for example, if I said "All the people who like Diablo I, II or III are keeping gaming from becoming a progressive medium in the modern world", I would be: a) Correct and b) A total wanker.

All the people who like Diablo I, II or III are keeping gaming from becoming a progressive medium in the modern world.
It is true. Don't believe me? Check this utter piece of shite over at MTV Multiplayer. I read it and though…

GTAIV is to prostitute murder simulator as....

So GTAIV still grabbing headlines. Some good some bad. But one statement that crops up time and time again, by the naysayers, then reiterated for ridicule by the defenders, is that GTAIV is some kind of prostitute murdering simulator. Which, to be fair it can be. But why focus on such a tiny little possibility in the game? Oh to grab headlines and take up some column inches. But come on journos, senators, presidents and prime ministers. You ain't gonna beat GTAIV. No the game is way too popular and successful. Rockstar has had more court cases than hot dinners and there is even a book out that pretty much says GTA, it's okay. So come on hacks and political wannabes. Rockstar and GTA are a well defended fortress. You aren't gonna beat them. But if your criticism about games you never played boils down to repeating a single sentence to get the mob going, why not choose a softer target than the battle hardened Rockstar. So once again Christian Mothers Against Everything, Dail…

Machinima...

...isn't all pointless shit. Some of it is cool pointless shit. Yeah so Wow was so a year ago and even Portal is starting to get old. Just you wait. GTA IV is gonna land and you won't ever have to hear that cake song again!

WoW Videos

Congrats to BaronSoosdon.

Oh and also, if you've got time to waste Halolz is GOLD at the moment.

Blah, blah, blah

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Discerning readers may have caught wind of the latest study confirming that there is a positive correlation between exposure to violent media and violent behaviour.
The study was undertaken by L. Rowell Huesmann at the University of Michigan, funded by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and published in the Journal of Adolescent Health.

In an uncharacteristic manoeuvre we actually got hold of this journal paper, unlike most of these scummers, and had a read. And what you find in the report is not what is being bounced around the web, cut down into bite size chunks for morons like you and me to read, comment on and then ignore.

The paper was good but didn't have any images. There is only one typo, which, although unfortunate isn't entirely unexpected.

There we go, yet another example of high fidelity Gaming Journalism from the World's Second Greatest Video Game Blog of All Time, That Guy's A Maniac.

*Sigh*

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The internets! You dissapoint me. Following our request here I was expecting a torrent of videos this morning. But alas:

I DON'T SEE IT THERE DO YOU?

I had high hopes for the GMV/AMV (Game Music Video/Anime Music Video) Community. I was thinking that you all made derivative Naruto videos with a Linkin Park/Evanesence soundtrack only because no one was making good suggestions for you to use some creativity. This is your chance! A video of this design would bring you your internet five minutes (people online have a shorter attention span) of fame. You might have even got a five star video as rated by real people, not the fellow animu weabos from the forums. You might have made the front page of Kotaku. Do you want to be remixing your shitty video for the rest of your life in the name of fan service? We threw you a bone and this is how you repay us? Well, AMV community, we'll see to it that none of you work on the internet again. Fuckers.

You've got one week before we target AMV…

Games that I am still scared of even though I got quite far but have been stuck on the same bit for about 6 years

Alien Resurrection for the Playstation.














Post-Post Analysis. Oh! I've made so many mistakes here. What I did, was explained too much in the title which, left me nothing to expand on in the 'meat' of the post. Also, the parameters I set myself were way too narrow. If I'd spent a bit more time thinking about it, this post could have even been some kind of list. If I'd gone even further, I could have made some comment about horror games in general and how sometimes the old ones are always the best. I didn't even put an image in. Oh this is all wrong. Sorry guys. Dropped the ball a bit here. I'd say 3/10 try harder? Or maybe 3/10. See Me!

Hilarious

This post was going to be a "how-to write a generic games are bad article for newspapers". You know the kind of article that is blindly ignorant of Jenkins' 8 Myths about videogames. I say this post was going to because dirty love rat laughing stock Mario Party "politician" Boris Johnson already did it for us here. We read it in the more cost-less content EDGE this month. We were thinking of making him the That Guy's maniac of the month but then the Telegraph might pick it up and put it on the front page. The Telegraph is allegedly one of only two UK newspapers that employs a person to google the name of the paper every two hours. Any results are then cut and pasted into the letters section to make it look like they have readers. We do that too. All the anonymous comments are secretely us except "I love the way all the comments are between themselves". That's one of Amber's flunkies. Anyway, the thing:

Here's a list of phrases and terms…