THE DEFINITIVE BARRY BURTONS RANKED

"It's back Barry. It's ruddy back" Said Ron. Yes it's time for the 2019 Barry Burton Rank Off #BBRO where we rank Barry Burtons on a scale from Barried Up To The Hilt to I'll Be The Coat, You Be The Hook Barry. Can't find your favourite Barry on the list? It's a gross oversight from us. We should get fired.

8. Barry is that you Barry?
As seen in: Resident Evil Franchise.
Description: Not all Barry are born equal. We'd rather this Barry just held us and stroked our hair.


7Flesh Barry
As seen in: Resident Evil Franchise.
Description: The Barry that got our gussets gooey all the way back in 1996. That he's this far down in the list goes to show how Barry some of the Barrys are out there! His blood type is O. M. G.


6Gai Den Barry?
As seen in: Resident Evil Franchise.
Description: This Barry is blocky. This Barry is bulky. We've got some ideas about that hunk o junk. We'll give you a clue- BURY IT BARRY. BURY IT. 


5Bangief
As seen in: Resident Evil Franchise.
Description: Not technically a Barry but same energy. How can you deny foot hair that comes out of his boots?


4Longhead Barry
As seen in: Resident Evil Franchise.
Description: This Barry really brings the straight to TV movie vibe that keeps us up after the kids have gone to bed, if you know what I mean?


3Skin Barry
As seen in: Resident Evil Franchise.
Description: What's the next best thing if you can't get a Barry in you? Get yourself in a Barry! We'd wear this All. Night. Long.


2Barry Tidy
As seen in: Resident Evil Franchise.
Description: What has Kathy got that we don't Barry? Did she help with Moira after the shooting? No. Did she blame you for the gun in the house? Probably? We wouldn't. When you're done fooling with that girl, come see some real women Barry. We'll be waiting.


1Barry Me?
As seen in: Resident Evil Franchise.
Description: Jesus fuck. The gut squeezing between the ammo belts alone has got us shaking at the knees not to mention the flirtatious excess belt flapping about like that. We're dissolving Barry. We're dissolving. Why can't you be real Barry?

That's it for this year's Barry Burton Rank Off #BBRO. Join us next year for some good old family Burton Bashing Barry Ranking. 

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Anonymous said…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHjfdeVvJP0

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