We're fans here of the one man project which despite being an overwhelmingly fan pleasing endeavour and entirely violence oriented manages to put most modern games and the whole of Hollywood to shame including blockbuster movies featuring transforming robots with million dollar budgets and fight scenes which are made by putting a kettle, two forks and a sieve into a washing machine, setting it on spin and filming it.
This one guy, with less time, staff, money, technology and cocaine does better. By a million. I would happily pay full price for Dead Fantasy I-V on DVD than Resident Evil Shitgeneration, those awful other Resident Evil Films and Advent Children put together.
And who needs a storyline? Buy a fucking book if you want stories. Pricks.
Anyway Dead Fantasy IV, V and VI are kinda up on the net. But we're not going to post a link here until Monty Oum himself uploads the full versions any day now....
Hot on the heels of E3, there are a couple of Heavy Rain trailers up on the PS3 network. I've seen em both.
One of them is your typical trailer packed with mysterious sound bites, action sequences and a quite impressive looking dance floor. The other is a demonstration of how the game will play.
Now, we were fans of Fahrenheit for the first hour until Monster Syndrome kicked in. Then we weren't fans. Then we were fans for the dead man sexing bit. Then we weren't fans again.
Heavy Rain does look good but the demonstration showing a rather plaid looking woman going into the bogs to sex herself up a bit did leave us feeling. Well. A bit cold. The idea of the demo is that she has to sex herself up a bit to, I dunno, sex a dead man or something. So she enters the toilets and then looks into the mirror. At this point a bunch of arrows pop up around her hair, face, tits and cooch and the player has to help her get slutified through a bunch of analog stick movements. So selecting th…
Hidden beneath literally millimetres of wit, satire and irony, the joke in this latest installment of the paint created, pixellated, irregularly posted, fully clickable, popular webcomic Omastar Comics will be missed by all but the sharpest of readers. This week Omastar is minding his own fucking business thank you very much.
In other gaming news:
We turned 3 years old a while back. The party was awesome thanks for all those who came along. Guitar Hero 5! looks like Guitar Hero. Dread Kong in the upcoming New Play Control! Donkey Kong Jungle Beat has been officially confirmed as racist. Expect N'Gai Kroal to be on the case ASAP.
So yeah Project: Natal? We all know and realise it is a glorified Wiimote (but better). But it must have some use in that moral grey area dividing sex and games, here are a couple of suggestions.
1. Interactive Web chat. Webcams all over the world are currently being used to allow wannabe pornstars work from home, and using the conduit of the internet project themseves naked into the bedrooms of curious teenagers who stole their parents credit card. So why not apply this to Natal, allowing gamer chicks to make some cash to fund their habbit. Hell I can see in the near future a website of gamer chicks avatars showing who is online and you just buy their gamertag. So where does Natal play into this? Well from those of you that saw the Natal preview you'll have seen that there were two burds discussing what outfit to wear and projecting it on them. Cue the frenchmaid, dominatrix and Jill Valentine outfits... But how will this funtion from the fappers point of view? Well ideally you nee…
Essentially it is a 3rd person Hack n’ Slash, however there is a multitude of things that set this one aside from the regular crowd of movie tie-in trash games:
1. It is not a move tie-in. Yes it may have a few things in common with the movie, such as the likeness of many of the characters, but the plot seems to be its own entity. (This was because the game was in development before the movie was in production, good call from the guys at Raven) 2. The fighting is a new level of fun. We have all got a hack and slash game that we all love in our hearts, whether it is Devil May Cry or Kingdom hearts. Thankfully this game differs from the usual repetitive Hack and Slash action of other movie tie-ins or trash games, there is a great mix of skill and luck. Basically the action is not repetitive, the combos and the timing of the button pushes are really intuitive, allowing for different types of gameplay, e.g you can choose to counter or just straigh…