Kaz Hirai and Sony full of shit


Via Kotaku via Official PlayStation Magazine:

It's difficult to talk about Nintendo because we don't look at their console as being competitors. They're a different world and we operate in our world — that's kind of the way I look at things...

And with the Xbox — again, I can't come up with one word to fit. You need a word that describes something that lacks longevity... Last time I checked, they've never had a console that's been on the market for more than four or five years and we've committed to a ten year life cycle, so you do the math...

And unless things go really bad, there's no way that at the end of a life cycle our competition is going to have a higher install base.

RAGE RAGE RAGE. How are you competing at all? We're all sick of this shit. No one believes you anymore. No one believes that you aren't royally fucked. Otherwise there would be some kind of new gaming news instead of endless stat tweaking reports about how the PS3 is outselling the other consoles on "small islands" or in "countries beginning with K". We don't give a fuck about any of that shit. Stop the bullshit. Do something. Stop releasing new editions of your console.

I imagine it's difficult to talk about Nintendo because playing as Solid Snake in Super Smash Brothers Brawl is about 400 times more fun than playing Metal Gear Solid 4, one of two 'games' that you might need to buy a PS3 for (the other being Little Big Joke).

Which brings us onto the Xbox 360. Last time Kaz checked they didn't have a console that's been on the market for more than five years. That's great Kaz. You may also check again and notice that they didn't have one of the most popular consoles with some of the greatest games of all time which they then didn't completely piss on and abandon for some new iteration which sucked balls so hard that two years after launch is still way too expensive, unsatisfying and nothing short of an absolute joke. I was a die-hard PlayStation fan as were all my console gaming friends and I watch a lot of films and I like to download shitty cheap throw away games but I would still buy four Xbox 360s and Dead Rising over a PS3 anyday and enjoy it infinitely more. In fact if I was given a PS3 for free I'd be dissapointed for a bit. I'd then get Singstar and probably Advent Children on Blu-ray. And that would be it.

Now the best bit "And unless things go really bad". Things are really bad Kaz. They are really really bad. Did you see those this is living ads? There was a reason they weren't about anything because there is nothing when it comes to the PS3. Nothing. All the exclusives went cross platform. Haze was arse, Killzone has always been and will always be a 7/10 franchise at best. Resistance is....uh. Just meh. Don't you get it? Ape Escape won't do it anymore. Remember the glory days when you had Crash Bandicoot, Final Fantasy and Lara Croft all to yourself. Those days are gone. Wasted. So shut your shit up. THe next press release I want to read from anyone at Sony better be something like this:

"Dear everyone. Sorry we fucked up so bad. It was the people in marketing that made us do it. We realise we have no games and that special features on DVDs are probably the last thing people are interested in so we're going to ditch going on and on about blu-ray the whole time. We're going to stop messing around with generic games and we're going to stop copying the Xbox 360 all the time with trophies and all. Fuck home and little big planet. What were we thinking? AH ha ha. Home sorry big joke here at the office. Listen were going to fix Armoured Core and Wipeout finally. We're going to buy Colony Wars and crank out a million sequels and then go back to the happy Ico and Shadow of the Colossus days when people want to buy our console again to play decent games on. We'll fix backward compatability too so then at least PS3 owners can play all those really really good PS2 and PlayStation games no problems. Then we're going to release a disc with the top 100 PlayStation games on it, totally free so that people remember why they loved the PlayStation so much because we've completely shat over our die hard fans outside of Japan. Oh and we're going to just ditch the PSP and start doing games for the DS like we should have a long long time ago."

If it isn't something pretty much along those lines then SOny can go fuck offalong with Capcom.

Comments

Anonymous said…
When I went out to get my next console(after my PS2), I had 2 options xbox360 and PS3. Games are ported btw those two. The Wii does not provide the same games those 2 provide. So, any person who isn't new to gaming knows the Wii is in a class of it's own. It's the only option in its department
Quadbee said…
That my brother was a legand of a write, i tottally agree i loved the ps cut me in half and i would bleed ps but now.... its all changed, left for dead, halo, gears of war will be the grave of sony ps, sony is just not good enough, the playstation 4 better be something bloody spectacular!!!! otherwise i'm one of those sad die hard fans that will be changing my mind.
__r,d,__ said…
What a tard. 'cand find one word to fit [xbox360]' followed by 45 words bashing it. This is coming from the company who created the console on which I could watch movies on in higher-than-visually-possible HI-def while grilling hamburgers. You can't just add dvds to a grill and call it a gaming system unless you're Sony, apparently.

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