Monday, June 30, 2008

T-Shirt of the Scarlet Crusade

So yeah, I have been officially playing WoW casually* for a while now, my most recent project has been levelling a Paladin (currently lvl 63) which I have really been enjoying in some slightly risqué ways, I have not been RPing her per say. However she does have the Tabard of the Scarlet Crusade, the whole Scarlet Chains Set, and I made sure I did all the Scarlet related quest lines in Eastern Plaguelands and Stratholme. Enough that I think we can all just agree I am a little bit gay for the Scarlet Crusade.

Who are the Scarlet Crusade?

I ain't gonna go into it, there are plenty of other websites that can go into the details, they are essentially a bunch of Zealots who beleive that the all the Undead in WoW should be eradicated, along with anyone who sides with them, or indeed anyone who doesn't side with the Crusade.

But there is a whole load of meaty story to them, political intrigue, spies within the ranks and corrupt figureheads.

So anyways, one of my IRL friends who, along with myself and a few others founded the guild , celebrated her birthday this past weekend. And as such I decided to get her this:

Everything was made from scratch, including finding the damned font that WoW uses (BTW it's Friz Quadrata)

The graphic was extracted and edited, and the T-Shirt was printed using the T-shirt Studio.

Here is the RL Vìlya sporting the [T-shirt of the Scarlet Crusade]:


EPILX REAL LIFE LEWT!!!!

*Casually my left testicle! this would be my 4th character, after my lvl 70 Mage, my lvl 70 Hunter, and my lvl 70 SPriest, In saying that to refuse to raid, I have touched on a wee bit of Karazan, but i generally cannot commit to 4-5 hours of mincing about with cyber-people. However, Good hard gank is a progression guild, despite me fapping about with Scarlets, the other members have progressed to Serpentshrine Cavern and have 6/6 Zul'Aman. Big up to them all :D

At your side M'Lady,

Link on Wow insider

Richie.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Ummm

This rather creepy, Something Awful did a generic gamer guy skit:



It is worrying how similar this is to myself and Cunzy, putting the OTT homoeroticism to one side of course.

Hearty Masculine Handshake,

Richie

Gamer T-shirts


Seriously how effin cool are these T-shirts! Hypno, Mewtwo, Articuno, Cubone... all done in a tasteful* way.

If only there were some other gamer T-Shirts that were tasteful... The hunt begins.

* i.e. you could wear them in public, without people shaking there heads or pointing an laughing at the disgrace that comes with wearing a Pokemon Tshirt.

TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever: Number 44

Yes it's Resident Evil Gaiden for the GameBoy Color. Color should have a "u" in it.

Leon goes to special school

We've never played it, even though it's ten pounds from amazon. We probably won't either because the GBA is no doubt some kind of corroded battery affair by now. We're also opposed to it because it is called "Gaiden". Which sounds a lot like gay den.

Resident evil gay den: After the events of resident evil 1 & 2 Barry and Leon are hanging out at their secret tree house base. After Claire goes to Europe to find her brother, the boys discover through a friendly game of spin the bottle that Leon and Barry may be more than just friends. Play as Barry or Leo in in this exciting adventure for the GameBoy color. Choose the right time to come out to Rebecca. Berate Barry for always going on about Chris as if he is in love with him or something jesus Barry if you love him so much why don't you go to Europe to find him. Tell Leon cunning lies about Ada Wong in order to keep him the right side of the fence......

All we know is that Resident Evil purists worry that Gaiden isn't strictly "canon" but anyone worrying about a story with zombies on a boat being canon or not canon deserves to be purged from the internet and indeed the wider world. GIVE WIKIPEDIA BACK PURISTS.

List so far, so good:

45: Final Fantasy VIII
46: Resident Evil Genesis
47: Dino Crisis 3
48: Dead Rising
49: Resident Evil Confidential Report File 1
50: Biohazard 4D Executer

Monday, June 23, 2008

TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever: Number 45

Welcome back to the Top 50! What comes after 46? Well, it's only 45! Some of you predicted this one on our Top 50 forum thread. Yes, it's Final Fantasy VIII!

Photoshoppid this myself! I know the filters. That's right.This is the only Final Fantasy on the list! We know what you are thinking, "Final Fantasy VIII! Better than VI!". And the answer is yes! Final Fantasy VIII had everything and it is still the most played of the Final Fantasies IN THE WORLD. It had a great storyline, especially the bit where you had to talk to a dog and the bit where everyone remembers that they forgot that they all grew up together! Squeenix gold. VIII makes the grade because it is the only Final Fantasy with three "woulds" in the main line up (Irvine, Rinoa, Tifa). Lastly, like all gamers TGAM cried like a widdle girl when Rinoa died! What a game, what a 45th TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever entry!

The list so far:

46: Resident Evil Genesis
47: Dino Crisis 3
48: Dead Rising
49: Resident Evil Confidential Report File 1
50: Biohazard 4D Executer

Next on TGAM Top 50? It's all the fours!

WiiBrator

FYI getting your flaps pinched down the side of the A button really fucking hurts so use a condom if you are gonna go for it hardcore
Well, I'm sure we all saw this coming, but someone has finally done it. As I'm sure most of you are aware, the Wiimote can be linked up to your PC, and using certain homebrew programs it can be used like a mouse, and there are some even some crazy little coders that got the PC guitar hero clone, Frets on Fire, to work with the wiimote guitar! And there was even the inevitable Wiimote vibrator programs.

But to take things further, someone has homebrewed some Wii software which allows this vibrator software to wrok with an image slideshow, and has online support for 32 people.

There you go, I'll let you contemplate those images for a while...

Luv n Hugs,

Richie

Friday, June 20, 2008

Another hilarious spin on pokemon names

Taken from the site that took my idea for jillsammichs, and expanded it to include, Halo, Smash bros, pokemon and Orange box, instead of just Resident evil:

Yet another site that ripped us off: Halolz

TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever: Number 46

Well we've had zombies, zombies, zombies and zombie dinosaurs in our hotly anticipated TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever. What could possibly beat 50-47? Well something has to otherwise the list is pretty flawed no? Chortle!

Well today children in at number 46. We're going to get complaints that this one is so low I know it in my heart! Yes, yes it's only fucking RESIDENT EVIL GENESIS for the mobile phone!

ACTION, ZOMBIES and ADVENTURE and you could be setting your alarm or calling someone or facebooking. FoolNot the first, not the last retelling of Resident Evil 1 but surely the most 46th on the list! Yes indeed. I hear what you are saying. Is this really better than Dead Rising? Well check the list because Dead Rising is lower than this so DUR SPAZMOID of course it's better! Does Dead Rising have Barry Burton in it? No? I didn't think so.

Wow what an exciting week. Readers have been voting and commenting in the half dozens at least. What does next week's list bring? I'll give you a hint. "NOT METROID OR ZELDA". Yes. Can you guess what it is yet?

The fairest and most empirical list of greatness so far:

47: Dino Crisis 3
48: Dead Rising
49: Resident Evil Confidential Report File 1
50: Biohazard 4D Executer

Expanding the family tree!

Every now and then the internet helps us to find family members and lost friends. We rediscovered Miss Bea Havin from 90s game magazine Playstation Pro and we even found our sister. Our real sister not the one we made up . And today we may have found one of our cousins "droolingmaniac". We found him commenting on some bullshit post over at Game Daily? (Who? The site looks like IGN and reads like joystiq so were not even linking it). Anyway the article is about reviewers "seven deadly sins" but the author of the post forgets that writing a review isn't some kind of herculean task. Anyone can do it. Few can do it well. Our cousin, who we will refer to as "drool" put him in his place with this lovely comment:

"This piece of superficial nonsense doesn't inspire confidence in the gaming press. So much of it points to the author's inability to follow his own advice. He's conscious of some of his transgressions, but at the same time his own recommendations often display a sheer lack of judgment when it comes to evaluating the criteria he proposes. For example, in "Forgiveness," he suggests it's the job o*****ame reviewer to be "crotchety nit-pickers." In the very same paragraph, he writes that he finds the flaws in Grand Theft Auto IV to be "inconsequential and beneath mention," an absurd, defensive posture that's out of touch with the game's many, many shortcomings. He *forgave* a plethora of serious design flaws - clunky controls, save structure that forces boring repetition, and a broken cover system, among others - because of what? Because the game had an impressive depiction of a city? Because other aspects of the game were fun? Is his proposal that reviewers should nit-pick, but then reason that their own nit-picks are beneath mention? Why bother nit-picking if that's the case? Similarly, how can the author make a call for exciting, involving reviews with top-shelf writing quality when his own article is steeped in cliche and fluff? "Seven Deadly Sins of X" is . "Score like you mean it." "Afloat in a sea of hype." "Doses of PR and Internet enthusiasm in my bloodstream." "Life's too short to doubt your feelings." The author is alternately insultingly trite and hopelessly lacking in apt analogies. Can we expect an engaging review from this person? It's difficult to imagine. Is he representative of his peers' writing aptitudes? That remains to be seen, but I can't say that the majority of game reviews I read are any better. Even putting aside his poor use of writing as a form, his lack of logical support for his arguments is apalling. "Make your arguments and back them up," he demands of his fellow members of the gaming enthusiast press. Yet in the same article, he argues that someone giving a review that's "out of step" with the rest of the press means "so much more" precisely because they're in disagreement with the others. That argument has no logical basis. An opinion has no more meaning just because it's contrarian. The review scores would mean "so much more" if they dared to give the game a score it deserved when everyone else would not. Because they would have journalistic integrity. But the author explicitly states he doesn't care whether it's a review that's more honest than all the rest or one that's simply "a feeble grab for attention." The author is pounding his shoe on the table, calling for reviewers to go out and have an opinion. I have news for him. Having an opinion isn't going to rescue a profession full of gaming-man-children-turned-pseudo-journalists. Maybe someone out there should be calling for reviewers to have *honest* opinions. This one could take or leave the "honesty" part. Speaking of things that aren't going to save gaming journalism, there's nothing in this article that's going to repair its problems. How incredibly out of touch it is for the author to call for reviews that "tell a story" and aren't "totally thorough," and expect his article to be relevant. These aren't seven deadly sins of game reviews. Half of them are just things that make game journalists ****** writers. That's not the actual important problem with game journalists. The problem is that they review games like kids with game consoles instead of like professionals. What are their real deadly sins? Not actually studying journalism. Having no structural division between their department and their outfit's bizdev department. Accepting advertising money from the same industry they critique. Becoming "fans" of particular game franchises or companies and losing objectivity. Giving every new AAA title of the last 3 months a perfect score and believing that that shows they've evolved in their thinking and now finally recognize art and industrial revolution when they see it, while simultaneously failing to evaluate those titles on anything but the most superfluous level, and not taking them to task for their pacing, writing, or craft (GTA IV's story is predictable and hackneyed? Who cares? MGS4 constantly interrupts gameplay with insipid dialogue? Big deal!) the way a film critic would for his medium. Equating high production values with artistic substance. Being so completely clueless as to think that their industry's problem is a need for a bill of rights, or not using enough of the "universe of adjectives." There's your problem. How about you get together and get all that figured out. Start building up an industry of professionals instead of fans. Then you can take some extension school English classes."

Tl;dr but hey! He is family after all. Welcome to the clan drools.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever: Number 47

So far, so good. Three great games on the list, I'm sure you'll agree (aside from two of them not really being games). So what is better than Dead Rising you might ask? Well it's only frickin Dino Crisis 3!

It's a dinosaur! At last I can use the dinosaursagain tag

Although much hated by most gamers, we don't share that opinion because we have never played it. The last time I checked it still wasn't backward compatible with the Xbox 360 which is a testament to how much it is hated considering that titles like Catwoman, Dinotopia and Bass Pro Shops Trophy Hunter 2007 have been emulator enabled.

However, it remains one of the greatest games of all time because from reading the instruction book, looking at the back of the box, examining the screenshots and watching videos it has genetically altered dinosaurs in space. Which is kind of like dinosaur zombies in space which in turn means that it is practically Resident Evil in space which is where Albert Wesker lives. What a great game!

The list so far:

48: Dead Rising
49: Resident Evil Confidential Report File 1
50: Biohazard 4D Executer

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever: Number 48

Time for number 48! Excited? I know I am really excited. Here's a clue to the game via an excellent screenshot from Eurogamer.


Can you tell what it is yet?

Yes it's Dead Rising (referred to as Dead Rizzling in TGAM circles thanks to a stupid customer). Why so low? Nobody asks. Well it's a compormise, I love Dead Rising but Richie has no time for it. So it's here. The first proper game on the list.

Dead Rising has everything: zombies, shopping malls, hot fat lesbo cops, ban in Germany, Jills Sandwiches, everyday violence, cults, guns, storyline, hideous save system, unreadable text, the Dante, Jill and Ryu zombies, cars, viruses and tits mcgee (never forget tits Mcgee). The usual capcom trappings of being a bit confusing on the first playthrough and the aforementioned save system only work to make it better in our eyes. Perhaps the greatest achievement is that the game works properly. So if you feel so inclined you can sit on the roof for the whole game until the chopper arrives*. It still remains the only reason to buy an Xbox 360.

The list so far:

49: Resident Evil Confidential Report File 1
50: Biohazard 4D Executer



*Did you hear that Bioshock with your infinitely long "the place is falling apart, you must escape" sequence at the end? Bastard.

Streetfighter 2 WTFOMG BBQ REmIX HD H.264

Might finally be out soon :D


Another 800 MS points, on a Live arcade game...


...That I will play for like 5 mins

Richie XX

Omastar Comics #19

This week Omastar travels to a universe where copyright and anachronisms don't exist.

Drawing vomit in paint isn't hard, I just couldn't bring myself to look at the comic any longer. There's something so wrong about it. <br />

Christ! Just what the fuck is wrong with the people who upload shit to deviant art? For God's sake, it doesn't even make sense. Why would this happen? Who appreciates this abomination?





































/fap

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever: Number 49

Yes that's right, it's number 49 in our highly successful TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever. After yesterday's non game we decided to include another non game. And todays 49th TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever? Resident Evil Confidential Report: File 1. Never heard of it? Shame on you. It's oft* been described as the mobile phone Halo.
Ah mobile games. You are shit. Should of stuck at snake and tetris
Yes, Resident Evil Confidential Report File 1 makes up for what it lacks in being a good game of any sort by having Resident Evil in the title. Did you know reader that in Japan Resident Evil is known as Gendengi Shen Doru Obu Natsuome Ou? Well it is! Imagine such titles as Gendengi Shen Doru Obu Natsuome Ou: Director's cut or Gendengi Shen Doru Obu Natsuome Ou: Outbreak File 2! It's batshit crazy upside down world is what that is.

So that's 49. 49 is so today but what does tomorrow bring? Well thanks to the vast number of votes in our hotly contended reader voting (visit the forum to join in), we have a surprise entry to the so-far Resident Evil dominated list.

The list so far:

50: Biohazard 4D Executer

*This meant to read "further in this sentence".

Monday, June 16, 2008

This shit is real (probably)

Silly daily mail.

Although by googling "daily mail al qaeda" I fear I am now on some kind of to be watched list. See what I do for you reader?

TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever: Number 50

So, as promised, here it is. No pussying around we're going straight in there without so much as a thought for preheating the oven. Readers have voted in their droves* So what is the first game in the TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever? Which game did we feel deserved recognition but not too many playthroughs? Which game did we think was better than number 51 but not quite as good as number 49? Well kids, it's....it's Biohazard 4D-Executer.

Yeah we're going there That's right, we're going there. So superior is our list to all out competitors, the first one on the list of TGAM top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever isn't even a fucking game. That's right we're going there. It's a film thing. The whole thing is on Youtube so make sure you watch it before complaining.

This ""game"" makes the list because we're sick of EDGE, IGN and Joystiq including fucking Myst and the sequels on top 100 lists. Seriously, I've sat through more interactive power point presentations for god's sake. Myst. Ha! It was wank. And then there were 100 sequels which no one ever played yet yearly some beardy who worked on it attends some videogame conference and everyone listens to them as if they are some kind of sage/mage. I cannot impress how much I hate Myst. In the grand old game of videogame top trumps, Myst would be the card that loses against ever single other card on all categories.

So Biohazard 4D executer is a film thing designed to be played in a cinema where bits of the seats would move and people would lick your ear at certain points for the "ultimate scare". I can't even be bothered to look but in all likelyhood it never made it out of Japan because Capcom like to roll like that. It has zombie things and guns and sewers and warehouses and zombie crows and mutating baddies that look like various prolapses so it's a winner in our book.

Tomorrow: That's right, we're gonna do number 49. See if we don't**



* Artistic use of readers and/or have voted.

** Quite likely actually.

Friday, June 13, 2008

Next week on TGAM

In order to belatedly celebrate our 2nd birthday and Capcom's 25th birthday and because there is nothing happening in games at all we're going to sell out like IGN and do TGAM top 25 no a top 50 ultimate TGAM top games best list of best games of all time ever. To shake up the usual format we're going to start at number 50 and work our way through until we get to number 1. Then we're going to stop and do other posts.

Given our recent activity levels this will probably take 38 years because we'll lose enthusiasm after number 47.

Classic TGAM is what no one says about this imageSo don't just sit around wanking over big brother for the next 38 years. Instead start pointless forum posts hypothesising about who is going to be number 11. Write a letter to EDGE when we include Final Fantasy XI but not VI or VII! Try to convince us to put any Zelda or Metroid* games in the list. You even have your chance to vote** for the top ten in this list so try to get all those underated multimillion selling games like Ico and the Ubisoft one with tits and the pig in it into the top ten! It's almost exciting. I'm so excited it reminds me of the time I first saw a fire engine and "nearly" wet myself.

*Don't.

**No you don't.

Exclusive Content

That guy's a maniac, the world's second greatest videogame blog, through reasons not well understood managed to score an interview with the legendary Hideo "Hideo, HIDEO" Kojima.

If anyone cared they'd complain that this isn't Solid Snake then I'd be all like check the alt text loser. So this is for you loser. Read it and weepThe interview was GREAT SUCCESS! A number of nibbles and nice tea were on offer. Lots of questions were asked, most were answered. Richie wore a hat throughout the whole thing and didn't even realise.

Score: The interview was perhaps the third best we ever done and made us proud to be part of the fourth estate for just a couple of hours. 7/10.

Thursday, June 05, 2008

Sister Site?


Well this is weird...

While sifting through the usual internet dross we found this site: That Girl's site

It seems this site is newer than ours, so she is blatantly ripping us off...

And to top things off she has some friend called "Punzie"...

Punzie??!?!

I know what you are all thinking, "That is a little too close to Cunzy". True story though.

Watch it Thatgirls! we've got our eyes on you

Luv n' hugs

Richie

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

2 years old!

Yes can you believe it! That guy's a maniac is now two years old*!

*mentally, in maturity, socially and verbally.



Here are some Pics from our 2 year party:Chris was on Security


The Cosplayers didn't communicate before turning up


Gratuitous Pic of the new Resident evil 5 Chick


Nemesis and Brad were caught "together" in the back alley.


Alexia brought her own date :(

A few Spaniards tried to gatecrash

Leon was late for his own party...


Here's to another year of barely legible posts and highly inappropriate fanfictions to minor resident evil characters.


LONG LIVE TGAM!!!!

Luv n' Hugs,

Richie n Cunzy