Remember the Irish
So Google is telling me it is St. Patrick's day either today, yesterday, tomorrow or this week sometime. St. Patrick's day is a day when the English get excited because for the lower classes it's an excuse to get special on Guinness and vomit on a car because we're not allowed to celebrate St.George's day because any kind of patriotism is racist these days. So in honour we're going to remember some of our favourite Irish gamers:
1) Keith "no saves" Blarney
Ne'er before or since Keith "no saves" has the world experienced a gamer so committed to busting games without saving. One time we were interviewing Keith at PAX and he ate a GBA in rage because someone was auto- saving in the booth next to him. Alas, Keith passed away in 2005 after four days straight of playing GTA San Andreas. He leaves behind a widow, two children and an unused PlayStation Memory Card we imagine he received from a well intending Grandma one Christmas.
2) Kieran "Multipass-Miles" Prower
One of the all time greatest Super Monkey Ball players of all time and surprisingly the only Irish gamer in this list who has been inducted into the All Time Great All Timers Gamer Hall of Fame. But, if there was a monkey in a ball you can guarantee he was umm..... rolling it. He also drew a picture of me as Claire Redfield once. It was awesome.
3) Siobahn "Double Click" Charm
For five years she held the record for the fastest double clicks in the world. Unfortunately, in 2005 after suffering a tendon strain she failed to make the national semis and retired from the pro tour. She can still be seen hustling in internet cafes in and around Dublin.
4) Keeno "super stealth" Rivets
Half Irish-half Italian, Keeno is probably still the greatest stealth game player of all time. He took every major Stealth Game Olympics title from 2002-2007. Records include the infamous 56 hour stealth on Metal Gear Solid: Potable Ops to take the 2007 title and fans fondly remember the 2004 SGO where he scooped gold in every event* despite not even being there.
5) Raz "No Scope" Black
Perhaps the most famous Irish Gamer of all time. Raz was brought up in a household with three older siblings and hence was only used to gaming with hand-me-down joypads, often with buttons missing or stuck in with jam and other sugary substances. It was due to this training that Raz allegedly never zoomed in with a weapon yet could no scope from any distance on any game. Raz still holds the records for the Bricking It, Pane in the Neck and Stain Removal challenges on Timesplitters 2 although in recent years a number of kiss and tell stories in the tabloids from ex-girlfriends claim that Raz wasn't as no-scoping as he claimed in the games media. The ongoing court cases will hopefully clear Raz's rep but either way this gamer still has a number of tournament wins under his belt.
So well the done the Irish! The gaming landscape wouldn't be the same without these contenders. Let's all raise a Guinness in their honour.
* UPDATE a number of readers have written in to point out that Keeno only managed the Silver in the Codemaster's SAS Combat event, the gold going to Div1ne W1nd obviously. Apologies.
1) Keith "no saves" Blarney
Ne'er before or since Keith "no saves" has the world experienced a gamer so committed to busting games without saving. One time we were interviewing Keith at PAX and he ate a GBA in rage because someone was auto- saving in the booth next to him. Alas, Keith passed away in 2005 after four days straight of playing GTA San Andreas. He leaves behind a widow, two children and an unused PlayStation Memory Card we imagine he received from a well intending Grandma one Christmas.
2) Kieran "Multipass-Miles" Prower
One of the all time greatest Super Monkey Ball players of all time and surprisingly the only Irish gamer in this list who has been inducted into the All Time Great All Timers Gamer Hall of Fame. But, if there was a monkey in a ball you can guarantee he was umm..... rolling it. He also drew a picture of me as Claire Redfield once. It was awesome.
3) Siobahn "Double Click" Charm
For five years she held the record for the fastest double clicks in the world. Unfortunately, in 2005 after suffering a tendon strain she failed to make the national semis and retired from the pro tour. She can still be seen hustling in internet cafes in and around Dublin.
4) Keeno "super stealth" Rivets
Half Irish-half Italian, Keeno is probably still the greatest stealth game player of all time. He took every major Stealth Game Olympics title from 2002-2007. Records include the infamous 56 hour stealth on Metal Gear Solid: Potable Ops to take the 2007 title and fans fondly remember the 2004 SGO where he scooped gold in every event* despite not even being there.
5) Raz "No Scope" Black
Perhaps the most famous Irish Gamer of all time. Raz was brought up in a household with three older siblings and hence was only used to gaming with hand-me-down joypads, often with buttons missing or stuck in with jam and other sugary substances. It was due to this training that Raz allegedly never zoomed in with a weapon yet could no scope from any distance on any game. Raz still holds the records for the Bricking It, Pane in the Neck and Stain Removal challenges on Timesplitters 2 although in recent years a number of kiss and tell stories in the tabloids from ex-girlfriends claim that Raz wasn't as no-scoping as he claimed in the games media. The ongoing court cases will hopefully clear Raz's rep but either way this gamer still has a number of tournament wins under his belt.
So well the done the Irish! The gaming landscape wouldn't be the same without these contenders. Let's all raise a Guinness in their honour.
* UPDATE a number of readers have written in to point out that Keeno only managed the Silver in the Codemaster's SAS Combat event, the gold going to Div1ne W1nd obviously. Apologies.
Oh my god, I got a name check in the second greatest video games blog of all time! There's a tear forming in the corner of my eye (the one I have left).
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, I only read news that is at least a month old.
Woo!