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Showing posts from March, 2008

We got a letter

So what? We get lots of letters. But this one was written properly and all thought out and stuff so it would be rude not to reply no? Plus it was from a girl.

Catherine Martin writes to thatguys:

Do games have a moral obligation to be politically sensitive? In recent months we have seen a handful of games clumsily attempt a politically savvy narative and blunder into every stereotypical pitfall they could. Now, however, games are about to breach an almost untouched setting: Africa.
Both Far Cry 2 and Resident Evil 5 have chosen this setting as an environment in which to destroy countless hordes of digital natives. More importantly, however, their plots are likely to involve the distribution and flow of medicines in the area. Here I am making a slightly educated guess about the plot of Resident Evil 5, but the evil drug company Umbrella and its infamous T-virus are bound to crop up somewhere. These are controversial and current issues surrounding the African nations as warlords illegally …

Watch

Listen. Learn.

Play RE4 again?

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Played it on the Gamecube: Check.
Played it on the PS2: Check.
Played it on the Wii: Check.
Played it on the 360... Nope, looks like I have some cheevos to get this time round...

As great as all this is... Where is my RE2 remake?

P.S. This is possibly an April fools photoshop, but I don't think it is that unlikely.

Epilating is the new black

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Check those pits! Cammy is the choice of the axillophiles!

Take note, Evangeline Lilly, Mohinder, and all you other HD TV wonders that don't believe in a proper skin care routine.

Warning: new term approaching…

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I’m coining it here, right now, mark this day, it’s “Blog Artist”. Now this doesn’t mean some dude that creates “art” (graphics) for a blog. It is the art of blogging. One who has blogging to a fine art. I considered shortening this to Blogists, or artiloggers however this cheapens the quality to which blog artists aspire too. The best way to define this new class of bloggers is to use analogy to rock pop culture: Rockers, can dress the part, listen to all the music, and quote trivia on their favourite bands. However to be considered an Artiste you mush have talent and create.

May I introduce to you the first two Blog artists ever:

Richie!

Cunzy11

Luv n Hugs.

Quick Question...

“Hey Richie, you know how you were bigging up Devil may cry 4, and even managed to get it early? How come you only have 3 Cheevements and are only at mission 8?”

Good question.

And to be honest it’s a culmination of many things:

Firstly my X-box was constantly Dirty Disking the game, I was getting 15 mins of playtime, and was reduced to saving after each red orb. This has now been rectified as I have upgraded to an X-box elite.

Secondly Katamari has been a big hit, don’t get me wrong I still <3 Dante, but that Katamari rolling game is stupidly fun to play as each level is timed, most of them being around 2 mins. As such I got 450 cheevements from some “casual” gaming.

And lastly*… and the main point of my post. I think I approached Devil may cry from completely the wrong angle, I found myself desperately struggling to work out the most efficient achievement based route through the game, trying to make my first playthrough as fruitful as possible… Gamerscore-whore. I’m far from an epic …

Remember the Irish

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So Google is telling me it is St. Patrick's day either today, yesterday, tomorrow or this week sometime. St. Patrick's day is a day when the English get excited because for the lower classes it's an excuse to get special on Guinness and vomit on a car because we're not allowed to celebrate St.George's day because any kind of patriotism is racist these days. So in honour we're going to remember some of our favourite Irish gamers:

1) Keith "no saves" Blarney
Ne'er before or since Keith "no saves" has the world experienced a gamer so committed to busting games without saving. One time we were interviewing Keith at PAX and he ate a GBA in rage because someone was auto- saving in the booth next to him. Alas, Keith passed away in 2005 after four days straight of playing GTA San Andreas. He leaves behind a widow, two children and an unused PlayStation Memory Card we imagine he received from a well intending Grandma one Christmas.

2) Kieran "M…

We* know** someone*** famous****

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What with being listed as an "industry link" over on RAMRAIDER and now knowing** the top Geometry Wars Galaxy player in the world surely this is the year of the maniac. And look!, Games Media Awards people, no ads so perhaps we should win the Best Commercial Non-Commercial Commercial Website Or Blog this year yeah? Yeah? Then we can finally give up our jobs packing battery chickens and write posts about Resident Evil full time!
So without further ado, congratulations to DR Hamhock MD who by now must have been signed by Nintendo and is currently developing a Dr Hamhock limited edition Wiimote holder and/or DS stylus for mass release. Well done, you made it son*****, you made it.

* By we I mean me. Cunzy1 1. Richie left the blog about two years ago and since then I've been dressing up as her and doing posts about dildonics and naruto. That was until Claire interrupted me when I had the Richie wig on and was posing in the mirror talking in a Scottish accent. I went 'speci…

WAR Screenie competition

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Yeah I made a post! But I hid it all the way back in time if you can believe it! This is the screenshot competition for my friends I lost to WAR. The competition was simple, submit some screenshots of WAR that include the usual MMORPG silly elements such as 'chicken', 'sheep', 'awful clipping' or dinosaurs.

You, know the shots the company would never use to promote the game itself. The competition lasts as long as I say it does. Currently we have three submissions, the artists names have been changed to hide their real identities.

1) 'Horned Squig' by Wowcansuckmyballs

The first submission and the most thoughtful it screams realism and I think the artist intended it as a criticism of the tuna and sweetcorn sandwich combination. 200 points.2) "Still life" by I'msowhackyIputjaminmyshoes This submission truly captures the lonely nature of MMORPGs 24.5 points

3) DINOSAURS BY AWESOME DUDE And you still wonder why people lose their family, friends …

Ode to medipack (Vagina)*

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Medipack or is it Medi-pack?
You make no sense
How do you work?
You save my life often but you could never work in real life

Medipack or is it Medi-Pack?
Sometimes you have a red cross
Sometimes green
Sometimes you come in three sizes but surely it would be better for everyone if you just came in large size

Medipack or is it Medi-Pack?
Sometimes you are a potion
Sometimes you are a herb
Sometimes you are a food stuff like milk or apples

Medipack what is in you to give life?
To cure all wounds by merely standing on you
Or sometimes going into the inventory and selecting "use"
Is it majicks?
I think it is.

*In my travels in Hoenn I wrote this ode as a sister ode to the classic An Ode to Spuddy. I was inspired by studying the Clamperl on Route 124.